Alcohol/Addiction "Neg" Help Requested

[Lighthouse]

Read some Pia Melody or Melody Beaty books... They have been where you are and you might get some help woth your own psychoanalysis.

Do you think the people within your community will not notice if it gets out of hand?  Your greatest strength is admitting what you perceive as your weakness and having the courage face it.  You need to do what is best for YOU and staying addicted to alcohol is not, I assure you.  

Is there nobody in your community you can go to for help who has been where you are?  You need help, it is extremely difficult for a person to handle alcohol addiction or really any addiction on their own.  Perhaps a therapist?  This will be confidential and they wunderstand these things.  You need someone there with you to provide you with their strength until you can handle it on your own, when you can be someone else's strength.  Believe me... someone who has been in your shoes will be happy to help you because by helping you, they are also helping themselves.  

Blessings to you and Please take care of yourself.


Kerri

[Eol007]

Hi Kathryn,

Welcome to the forum, and sorry to learn of your addiction problem. It is difficult to know how to best answer your question. I have been a heavy drinker in the past, but for me it was simply a matter of cutting back (basically I decided that I had had enough), and do not drink for weeks if not months and then only socially.

Although I do know and have known people with a variety of substance abuse and addictive issues! Baring only one or two individuals with clinical chemical/psychological addiction - the people I know either consciously choose to either refrain or maintain their mode of behaviour! I could say more, but would prefer others to add their feedback on the thread.

I feel that although Negs (as coined by Robert Bruce) have associations with people with addictive or obsessive behaviours and mindsets - it is in fact the individual who has the ability to seek and find resolution/closure to their problems. I can only assume from reading your profile that you also enjoy a healthy respect for personal well being, and can see clearly that you have chosen to do something about your issues.

I commend you wholeheartedly on seeking help as that is the best place to start. There are plenty of people here who are probably better qualified to help you than myself, but just be aware that your call has been heard.

I appreciate my words may not have been of much solace, but I hope they help at least a little.

Kind wishes,


Stephen []

[Rastus]

In the past, I could drink like the proverbial fish.

Lately I don't drink.  It was that sudden.  When I started to meditate and re-center myself, the "drive" or "need" to drink stopped.  It was part of self-healing.

For me, drinking was out of a desire to not feel what I was feeling.  By embracing my feelings, the desire to not feel them stopped.  So then did the drive and need to drink.

I know that sounds too simplistic, but its what worked for me.

There are several ways to combat it.  Meditation and inner strength help.  So does symbolism.  Get some sparkling cider (non alchohalic),  charge it with positive energy and envision it as an elixor to fight alchohalism with, and drink that instead.  That way you don't have to fight all the urges at once (the physical act of having the glass in your hand) or the sensations (sparkiling cider tastes different enough to not notice it has no alchohal).

[SomeBloke]

Hello,
Wow my 100th post, hope I have something constructive to say.
First of all, 2 glasses of wine a day is far from being a hopeless case, so don't be too hard on yourself!  There's a lot of evidence that there are significant health benefits to moderate drinking (especially red wine), and in fact 2 glasses a day is the upper level considered 'safe' for a woman.  (14 units a week)

I had always been a fairly heavy social drinker for years.  I would never have considered myself an alcoholic, but no way could I have imagined giving up drinking.  But then several years ago I took to drinking at home as well as social drinking.
It becomes habitual, and I was soon getting through a bottle of wine a night, maybe more if someone came over.  There came a point where I realised I really did need to cut down.

Here are the methods I used to cut back.
1) Try not to have surplus alcohol in the house.  If you want to drink at home, go out and get it that night.  Don't beat yourself up about it, if you're cutting down you are making progress.

2) If you only drink wine, this may not appeal to you, but it works:
Wine is very alcoholic, up to 14% is not uncommon.  If you look at beer or lager, the percentage is far lower.  You can probably quite easily find cheap beer at around 3% that tastes ok. For me that meant going from a bottle of wine a night to 4 tins of beer a night - doesn't sound too good, but in fact this was more than halving the amount of alcohol.  (And halving the cost!)
Also there is a greater amount of fluid in the beer, so you generally drink it over a longer timescale.
You will still feel pleasantly drunk, so this really isn't very difficult.

3) Introduce non-alcoholic drink, for instance alcohol-free beer.
By alternating between alcoholic and non-alcoholic drinks, you halve your alcohol consumption again.  The strange thing about non-alcoholic beer is, that it can still make you feel kind of drunk.
You begin to realise how much your experience of drink is based on habit, and psychological factors in addition to the alcohol itself.

Eventually I came to the realisation that more than anything else, the reason I drank was simply force of habit.  But that habit of needing something to sip in front of the TV was hard to break.  I switched to only drinking non-alcoholic beer, and it was easy.  By doing that for a while, any chemical part of the drink habit was broken without much difficulty.
Alcohol has the effect of a muscle relaxant, and it causes the stomach to distend. It is also a diurectic, (makes you dehydrated). So a natural consequence of you going to the non-alcoholic stage is that you don't feel like drinking so much fluid.  It's not hard to wean yourself off the non-alcoholic beer that you have used as a 'prop' - so now, mostly I drink water at home.

At the start, stopping drinking seemed like a very difficult task, and it was not even something I wanted to do.  But this strategy made it easy and has left me not missing alcohol, although I'm quite happy to drink socially now and again. It's only afterwards I could appreciate the psychology behind it, and the psychological reasons why this strategy worked for me.


Good Luck!

[4elements]

Thanks ya'all for the constructive advice. I'm going to try and reply all at once: Thanks Lighthouse!! I read works by those authors years ago, and went the therapist route as well, it worked for awhile......I still might look into it again....so thanks.

Thanks EOL007...some good advice definitely. I never get drunk, as I never want to lose control over a situation...but I DO have a habit, as anything I have everynight is an addiction. Cutting back for me hasn't seemed to work......and maybe your right...maybe this isn't a "neg" thing....but maybe it is also...I WANTED TO KNOW IF THERE WAS SUCH THING AS AN ALCOHOL NEG. BUT SO FAR FROM THE POSTS, I GUESS I MAY BE IN DENIAL AND THERES NO SUCH THING.....JUST MY LACK OF DISCIPLINE.

Thanks Rastus:  Bullseye!! I started reading "Initiation into Hermetics" by Bardon.  I started meditating last week, as the workbook demands it. I'm sure this will be a great supplement and I'm starting the apple cider ritual today. Your post really motivated me to continue....otherwise I will continue to feel like the proverbial "Initiate Loser"....THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!

Thanks Somebloke: Thats a whole list of information too!! Think I'll seriously up my water intake as well.....as I don't  like beer or hard alcohol....only wine...and expensive wine too....so if I'm successfull....my finances will improve!!

WHEN I STARTED THIS FORUM, IT WAS 3:00AM THIS MORNING. WHEN I WENT TO SLEEP I HAD A VERY VIVID AND AMAZING DREAM.  A YOUNG GIRL CAME UP TO ME AND SAID, "IF YOU NEED HELP, PLEASE ASK ME"...HER TEETH HAD A GOLD FRAME IN THEM (WEIRD I KNOW). SHE REPEATED THE SENTANCE AGAIN...FINALLY I ASKED HER WHAT SHE COULD DO FOR ME....AT THAT MOMENT....LONG SPIDERS (THAT LOOKED LIKE MY MOTHERS FAKE EYELASHES) STARTED COMING OUT OF MY MOUTH...SOME SHORT SOME LONG...THE GIRL...WAS HOLDING A TUB FOR ME TO KEEP SPITTING THEM IN....MANY CAME RIGHT OUT OF MY TEETH....WHEN THE LAST ONE WAS GONE....MY HUSBAND STEPPED HIS FOOT IN THE TUB...THE GIRL AND I TOLD HIM TO TAKE HIS FOOT OUT OR HE'D GET INFECTED.....THE GIRL PLACED ALL THE SPIDERS IN A SECURE BOX, WRAPPED WITH BUBBLE WRAP...I ASKED WHAT SHE WAS DOING WITH THE SPIDERS.....SHE TOLD ME THEY WOULD HAVE TO BE DESTOYED..SO AS NOT TO RETURN TO ME.........FREAKY DREAM......BUT I AWOKE THIS MORNING FEELING LIKE I HAVEN'T IN A VERY LONG TIME.  YOUR POSTS WERE VERY HELPFUL...I HOPE IT TRULY IS A NEW DAY FOR ME. THANKS VERY MUCH!!

[Rastus]

Normally I don't interpret dreams for people (your symbolism isn't my symbolism), but since your new here I'll make an exception.

That sounds like a classic cleansing ritual.  Removing the negs, explaining that help is available, closure that the negs won't return.  I have the impression it was your higher self, don't know why, just read that way to me.

Don't be afraid to ask for help in the healer sections!

[narfellus]

Definitely go to the Healer Section! We are here to help each other, and i was there for a caffeine and alcohol addiction problem myself just recently. I know know know how hard it can be, and i'm still trying to get over my problems, but i AM doing better.

Like you 4elements, i only like wine, red wine specifically. And TWO drinks a night is far from a critical problem, but if it bothers you then that's enough. And small problems can bloom into larger ones, particular is stress in your life lets alcohol negs get a better grip on grief and exploit it.

Cool dream though, spitting out the spiders. I can NEVER remember my dreams anymore that vividly, i feel like i'm missing out on my own higher self trying to tell me stuff.

My advice: listen to what the other posters said, they had some good stuff. Sparkling cider, lots of water, meditation and prayer.

Gluttony is my demon that throws everything together: alcohol, caffeine, food, sugary stuff. I don't even LIKE sweet stuff, but i've noticed when i'm actively cutting back, boredom (i.e. removal from regular buzzes) i want to eat more CRAP. Yeah, those negs are wily little bastards, but they're beatable, trust me. They're just illusory after all, and only want to sustain themselves, not OUR happiness. Good luck!

[litning]

[8D]4 elements,
I and my hubby quit drinking successfully 11 years ago.  The trick for us was to have each other to lean on.  We didn't want to let each other down... and we didn't want a fight (which going to the bars would definitely cause to jealousy).  It was important for me to have someone I respected around, because I lost all of my so called "friends" when I quit drinking. You can't go around them because you will be tempted to drink and you can't "just have one" because it doesn't stop there.  You have to find different things to do.  Different people to be around until you can get it completely out of your system.
I hope this helps.
Blessings.... litning
[]

[4elements]

Hi Everyone:

I could really use some advice on psychic self-defense against alcohol. I'm having a terrible time quitting alcohol......I've been trying forever. I buy the supplements: B-Vitamins, Herbs, Aminos,...I wear Amethyst constantly,... but when I come home from work, the alcohol-neg takes over. Yes, I've considered AA, but I live on an island, and I am active and well known in the community......plus I tried AA many times, but left the meeting wanting a drink always!!! I'm a functioning alcoholic...never drunk, but drinking at least 2 glasses of wine a day....... which to me is the worst kind,  as my neg keeps a shield of denial around me often....I'm absolutely depressed about this. I have an 11 year old son, and am married.  All three of us are familiar with "negs", etc., and when someone has a real bad psychic attack, the other 2 seem to be able to come to the aid ....but this issue seems to get skirted. Tommorow morning, I will bring this up in our family meeting, (if my neg doesn't talk me out of it) and maybe its a good start but I just feel like I'll never quit....heres' my question: HAVE ANY OF YOU SUCCESSFULLY QUIT ALCOHOL OR ANOTHER SUBSTANCE ADDICTION? IF SO, HOW DID YOU DO IT?  Thanks