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good techniques to get rid of shyness?

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Nay

Wonderful attitude!   It will all make sense in the end. :grin:

mactombs

Quotewell,in my opinions relationships are not worth all the hassle and possible complications.
also I'm an eugenicist.
i believe that only the best specimens have the right to reproduce.

Ever been to a trailer park in Kentucky? The best specimens reproduce far less.

Eugenics ... you really have a negative outlook, don't you? Try have a positive attitude for once. Don't hang so much worth on being un-single. There are plenty of other things to worry about ... Why focus on being co-dependent on someone who isn't even there yet? I think people are attracted to people who have their lives together. I'd work on that. Women can smell desperation.
A certain degree of neurosis is of inestimable value as a drive, especially to a psychologist - Sigmund Freud

Stookie

Good advice mactombs.

I like having a girlfriend, but I REALLY like having my personal space. Most of my break-ups have been because I'm not as social as them. So either way, I'm happy. So many people make it their life's mission to find "the perfect someone", and haven't even discovered themselves. And a lot of people can't find that other one, so they settle into an unhappy relationship because they feel they HAVE to be in one.

El-Bortukali

Quote from: mactombs
Quotewell,in my opinions relationships are not worth all the hassle and possible complications.
also I'm an eugenicist.
i believe that only the best specimens have the right to reproduce.

Ever been to a trailer park in Kentucky? The best specimens reproduce far less.

Eugenics ... you really have a negative outlook, don't you?

lol,why do you think that?
well,yes.that's the theory around eugenics.the IQ is decreasing by each two generations or something,because the less intelligent  people reproduce faster and in more quantities.blablabla  it's a very complex subject.


QuoteTry have a positive attitude for once. Don't hang so much worth on being un-single.



lol,but i don't 'hang' so much on being un-single.i don't really care.in fact,i appreciate the liberty I'm able to enjoy  :grin:  plus,with so many sexually transmitted diseases out there,I'm so much secure this way :cool:


QuoteThere are plenty of other things to worry about ... Why focus on being co-dependent on someone who isn't even there yet?


Indeed.i have other issues more important than this.and I'm working on them :P

QuoteI think people are attracted to people who have their lives together. I'd work on that. Women can smell desperation.


they can smell everything
:lol:
but honestly,even since  i stopped thinking about
girls,sex,masturbation,relationships,desires,etc, i feel so fresh and good


now,to be finish the transition i only need to become impotent.
I've been searching the Internet for methods,pills,etc to make me impotent,but so far I've only got 'how to cure impotence'.
iw ent to the doctor to see if he could help me out,but all he did was look like this" :shock:  :shock:  :shock:  :shock:  :shock: " trough the entire session  :roll:
Tá mo chroí istigh ionat

El-Bortukali

Quote from: NodesOfYesodthink of earthworms

really easy to visualize and a huge turn off but seriously for a moment

Aye,i can see how it works.
but i have a far more effective method.
every time i start having sensations i don't want i think about my female 8 th grade teacher.
works instantly!.

Quoteplease don't cut your self off from woman you don't have to screw them and many of them may need you.

i haven't 'cut' myself off from woman.
it's not like i am an eremite or something :lol:
i still interact with them when i have to.

Quotetry being there big brother first even the really old ones.


hm,if i help them out they get weaker. they have to learn not to get dependent on anyone.
Quoteyou don't want your feminine half of your brain to be the only woman in your life do you :)

I have my mother.it's more than enough to act 'as the female influence' in my life. :)

my brain has a female side? how do i kill it?

QuoteI also am A medieval Monk/Night at heart and it would not be right to just write them all off because they are weird *giggles* because the right ones have not come your way.... you could always save up for a hooker also

just an idea anyways good luck  :grin:

Nodes

lol,that last part was a bit hard  to comprehend
:smile:

HM,when  iwas younger ( I'm still young) i had the chance to get giggly with a couple of attractive girls.but  my mind kinda of blocked and didn't made me pursuit that end.

hm,hookers...:confused:


thanks for the input.
:smile:  

but remember,the important thing of this thread is not me,but the guy who created it,Donal!

btw,donal,any progress?

oh,and to the bloke who said(sorry forgot your nick) anything is possible,how do i increase my IQ?
Tá mo chroí istigh ionat

malganis

i dont know about that. Maybe acting like you really have a high one already? Not sure if that would increase it but IQ is not that important to achieve succes anyway unless you are really a retard with 70 IQ. Although many of them seem to be quite happy.

EQ is more important than IQ and you can increase it.
"What are you doing here, Nasrudin? his neighbor asks. "I'm looking for a key which I lost
in the wood?" Nasrudin replies. "Why don't you look for it in the wood?" says the neighbor,
wondering at Nasrudin's folly. "Because there is much more light here"

Donal

No progress as of yet, definitely gonna try out the techniques in this thread though.

Also, my cousin gave me a technique, think it is good?:

1st off, lay your hands down by your side, eyes closed or open. When you are shy. feel the feeling in your brain, then move it down your neck, then your arms ,then down to your hands. Make a ball between your 2 hands and put all the shyness in this. Now put the ball in one hand and throw it far away as you can, away into the sky out to space, like Zeus throwing a star.

It will take 20 or 30 times to work first, but eventually you will be able to work it in seconds. He said it has helped really. I am 19, he is 29 and said it helps him talking to ladies, he feels less shy definitely.
Now everybody wanna go to heaven but nobody want to die- Krayzie Bone

mactombs

Yes, I see eugenics as negative. Hitler was a great believer in eugenics ...

Donal, you're 19, so I wouldn't worry too much. ;) I think you'll get less shy as you become more comfortable with who you are and what you want ... and knowing that will make you attractive.

The method you gave sounds pretty cool.

Another one I might suggest is, anytime you think about something negative, like, "I'm scared this person will think I'm stupid," immediately cancel the thought out and replace it with a positive one. Do this for all negative thoughts. It's worked out great for me - especially if you pair that with total honesty with yourself.
A certain degree of neurosis is of inestimable value as a drive, especially to a psychologist - Sigmund Freud

Kazbadan

random ideas:
get out, go for a night club.

I lost my shyness on that kind of places.

probably not the best place to find The One (girl) but nice for "loose" yourself.

Also, learn more about seducing girls on
www.fastseduction.com

maybe you dont want to learn how to seduce girls, but doing it helps to loose shyness.

Always remember this rule: whatever you learn about shyness, be it on books or not, you need to apply it on real life. Get out of your computer and go outside!

if u dont like the nightclub idea, etc, try to go to a gym, pratice a new sport, etc and meet new people. Helps a lot. Also, going to th universuty helps a lot. The night life and the life of a student are great for loosing shyness

learn more about being confidence, also helps.

Maybe you could help us on helping you by telling us more about your past: why do u think u are shy? How was the education that u had? etc tell us a little about u. If u prefer, send pm.
I love you!

El-Bortukali

Quote from: mactombsYes, I see eugenics as negative. Hitler was a great believer in eugenics ...

and that makes eugenics evil?


the Jews have awesome genetic traits so don't go that way.


QuoteInspired by the American eugenics movement, Nazi Germany implemented the T-4 Euthanasia Program in which roughly 200,000 mentally and physically disabled Germans were killed, and about 400,000 sterilized.


guess who started the slaughter.

i am against the killing of any person let it be a  genius or below average IQ,just let the man live.
due to his low IQ he will soon enough pass over  without the need to get our hands bloody.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Race_and_intelligence#1850s_to_World_War_II





QuoteSelective breeding of human beings was suggested at least as far back as Plato, but the modern field was first formulated by Sir Francis Galton in 1865, drawing on the recent work of his cousin, Charles Darwin. From its inception, eugenics (derived from the Greek "well born" or "good breeding") was supported by prominent thinkers, including Alexander Graham Bell, George Bernard Shaw, and Winston Churchill,

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eugenics

i don't think I've seen those Doctors mass murder the Semite race.


where you're getting at is this:
QuoteIts scientific reputation tumbled in the 1930s, a time when Ernst Rüdin began incorporating eugenic rhetoric into the racial policies of Nazi Germany.

that was stealing.and the Jewish race in some genetic issues  are superior to the Germans.


i could care less if the individual is black,white,yellow,gay or pink as long as he has good genetic traits to ensure a better specimen.


yes,i see how this --> http://slate.msn.com/id/102689/ and this :

http://www.slate.com/id/100331/

is evil.


funny how people instantly associate 'eugenics' with Nazism.  :Rolleyes: but they don't mind  having 'better children' i guess as long as they don't have Scandinavian features.i.e,blonde hair and blue eyes,it doesn't make them  Nazis?(read the two articles to get what I'm saying) I'll just post a bit .

QuoteRobert K. Graham was a eugenicist. He was a pessimist about humanity's future. And he was a can-do, self-made multimillionaire. Those qualities fused to inspire the Repository for Germinal Choice. Graham, who made his fortune by inventing shatterproof eyeglasses, feared mankind was in danger because natural selection had stopped working on human beings. He explained his views in a muscular 1971 book, The Future of Man. Over millenniums, nature's brutality had strengthened the human gene pool, allowing the strong and smart to reproduce, while killing the weak before they could. But once man mastered his natural environment, Graham argued, he jumped the evolutionary track. Better living conditions allowed "retrograde humans" to reproduce. In modern America, thanks to cradle-to-grave social welfare programs, these incompetents and imbeciles were swamping the intelligent


this is not being 'racist'  this is reality.

QuoteSparta was, above all, a military state, and emphasis on military fitness began virtually at birth. Shortly after birth, the mother of the child bathed it in wine to see whether the child was strong. If the child survived it was brought before the elders of the tribe, by the child's father, who decided whether it was to be reared or not. If found defective or weakly, the baby was left on the wild slopes of Mt Taygetos. In this way attempts were made to secure the maintenance of high physical standards in Sparta. From the earliest days of the Spartan, the claim on his life by the state was absolute and strictly enforced.


by doing this they managed to create the greatest warriors of the ancient world.

this can be applied to everything.
better teachers.
better medics

whatever you want.


i don't know about you man,but I'd prefer a world with a small  population of rather intelligent humans than a world with a huge population of ,mentally retarded,'dull' average',aids,cancer,thief's,etc and the occasional genius.
Humanity has a HUGE potential and i just hate to see it all wasted.


i mean, i dunno..aren't you  seeking 'spiritual enlightenment,perfection or whatever? what's so bad about physical perfection?

and I'm doing my part by not spreading my low quality genes.
even though i've had the opportunity to do so.
but my love  for mankind prevented me .
(so now,my issue is not 'looking for girls' but rather a quest for higher Intelligence .

but i understand your fear.
humans are always afraid of evolution.
you don't really have to worry about it.
it will eventually replace the system we have now.
it probably won't be during your lifetime,so no sweat man.

anyway..I'm just waiting for the bloke's response to my question how'not everything is possible'


i apologize because   i might have had an outburst,but I'm pretty much tired of people calling me a nazist' which is quite amusing taking the fact that i am white but all of my friends are either of the African race,or Asians,or Indians or whatever.and they do have a  bright IQ.
and I'm inferior to them even though I'm white =]

plus i cannot be a Nazi since Nazi stands for Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiterpartei and i ain't no German.

so,no,colour has nothing to do with the quality of the specimen.

Alright,now don't get all over me just because  i analyze the situation with logic and a scientific eye ,not with my 'emotions' and 'conscience'

and don't take this as a personal 'attack' since you have the ability to astral project I'm sure your genetic code has some nice properties.


i think I'm done  with this issue.
thanks for passing  by!



I'm just waiting for the bloke's response to my question how'not everything is possible' 'and the possibility to increase IQ trough positive thoughts'


i think we've hijacked Donal's thread.
i am sorry mate :lol:
funny how me saying that 'thinking' doesn't attract females' goes directly to my mentality towards them' and then to my scientific notions of mankind's future.

how  i love this forum ;D


have fun reading this huge post ;D

oh and about the way I'm writing,blame it on runola,she's a bad influence  :razz:
Tá mo chroí istigh ionat

Donal

What happens is I don't get a negative though, I don't fear rejection, it is just shyness by itself! An intense feeling inside that makes me stay away from the girl. It would be great if I could find out the source of this. My shyness is so bad when I had to ring a person I almost rang the number a number of times, putting down the phone at the last number, then eventually getting to courage to ring. I can't stare at a girl for more than 1 second straight.

I need to meet new people alright. Here is my story (for Kazbadan):

I am not sure why I am shy, maybe cos of lack of experience with girls? I still haven't had my first kiss yet. I lost my mother to breast cancer when I was 3 and my Dad said I wasn't able to speak for months on end, and up to a year later I was asking where my mom was.

Anyway not speaking out obviously affected communications, and thus my development. I can remember being in Nursery (pre-school, around age 4) and I was always by myself. The other children used to play, but I was always by myself. I wasn't weird like. I can remember when I was 5 aswell and 2 boys that I played with, one of them whispered into the others ear saying for them to run away from me, and they did. That hurt a bit. When I wanted to play soccer (Futebol) the boys used to say no, we are playing 1V1, then another boy would come along and they'd play 1V1 and a goalie, and they'd say it's goalie and 1V1 now to me, they would never let me play.

Anyway for my education I was a bit overweight growing up, and this skinny dude used to always mock me, and I got in fights inside school aswell, even though I wasn't a trouble maker. The same happened in secondary school (junior high for americans), I used to get called names and people used to pick on me. I had some friends though, nice people, ones who wouldn't not pick on me. I was sociable to people I knew, I wasn't some loner in the corner, I was a happy child.

I dropped out of school in 5th year (1st year of high school for americans) after getting bullied, and continously harassed. I was offered multiple times a chance to fight fellas. The bullying hurt alright, I even carried a knife into school once cos I got affected so much. I didn't intend to use it, just for safety, but the school confiscated it and sent me home. When I left school I did nothing for 3 years straight. I'd be in home for weeks straight at the time, same 4 walls 24/7, only leaving to use the toilet and eat my dinner. Playing video games all the time. I went up to 18 and a half stone (13 and a half ATM) and was completely depressed. I moved out of home last year and am on the prozac and they revolutioned my way of thinking, it was like I was blind before, and I didn't notice it. I am starting to live my life again. From 15-18 was completely wasted. Maybe this story offers suggestions for why I am so shy?

I hope this post offers some info :)
Now everybody wanna go to heaven but nobody want to die- Krayzie Bone

El-Bortukali

hey donal,how's it going?

mate, Kazbadan can't answer right now.(he's sleeping) but i'll be sure to direct him to your thread when i see him on msn.
Tá mo chroí istigh ionat

mactombs

El-Bortukali, eugenics may be the stupidest idea smart people ever believed in (yes, I know the long list - you forgot Telsa in there, too). Did you know that scientists still don't know the first thing about genes, why certain genes manifest and others don't? A person is not their genes, and anyone who tells you science says so is full of it (Dawkins does not speak for science, BTW). What kind of philosophy is it for you to believe your genes aren't worth passing on? Astral projection has nothing to do with your genes. If eugenics ever happened, humanity would be doomed to extinction - you really need to learn something about mutation, etc. But this is not for this thread. I think I'm just getting riled up because I used to believe the exact same thing as you ...  :wink:

Donal, it sounds like your shyness has a lot to do with the atmosphere you had at school. Maybe you don't think you're thinking negative things, but you are - you still have the voices of all those bullies telling you you're fat, etc. inside your head. You need to look deep inside your thoughts, analyze them. Ask, why do I feel this way? Realise there are good reasons, and there is the honest reason.
A certain degree of neurosis is of inestimable value as a drive, especially to a psychologist - Sigmund Freud

Kazbadan

Well, i am not any expert or even a person with qualifications for helping people, so all my advices are just based on my own experience. We have some common points in our childhood, altought they still be different on many aspects.

Its seems that the fact of your being bulled and involved on fights with your friends didnt help tat much on developing an healthy personality. Nowdays bulling, picking (is that the word?...u know, when someone makes fun of you) fighting etc are very common on school and they affect students and their growth.

Another that affected you negatively was the fact of you getting closed on home for a long period.

Now, i think that you feel somewhat that people are not trust worthy (because of bulling ), you think that they are agressive and may hurt you. Maybe is that. Also, getting closed on home so much time shutsdown your social skills. I can tell that bymyself because i suffered with that problem too. It creates a vicious cycle of depression: you wanna get home and play computer and that makes you depressed and depression makes you want to get in home...its horrible.

I was very shy too, even unable to say hello to a girl that liked. I would get with my face red as hell just by saying hello to a pretty girl!! And if a pretty girl started to speak with me i would  get really nervous! Now iam the opposite. I am not a don juan but when i start working in a new place i will speak with everybody. In portugal i am a young teacher and that means that i need to "jump" from school every year. hat means also that i will meet new people. U know what: i am the first one saying hello to verybody now. In few days everybody on school will know my name and will associate my name with a nice person (sorry for being somewhat arrogant here, but thats not exactly arrogance, just the feeling on how things are). If i went in a night club i will be able to speak with girls. On any situation now i am much more open and warm and happy.

How did i get there? I dont knwo exactly, i think that it was a combination of factors, of small things, like u can see in my last message.

For example, having my firts drunk was helpful for strange that it may seems: beofre that i was very shy on nightclunbs, but when i got drunk for 1st time i started to dance a lot. Then , while drunk i realise that dancing was easy and nice. Also, speaking to people (man or woman) that u never met was easy too. I just need to get a similar state of "open mind" (like when u are drunk) but without getting drunk. Tha was the trick: getting an euphoric/happy state of mind. SO, in that time i realised that i was doing different things: getting out at night a lot (to enjoy music and be with friends), doing sports, going out for crazy dinners with frinds, etc. Suddenly i realise that having an active life and doing energetic things was nice! Suddenly i see that i was happy and that was great.

These changes in my life helped a lot on erradicating my shyness. When you reach that state, saying hello to a person u never met is a funny and happy thing. U just need to active that trigger of happynes and sense of open mind.


Quote from: DonalWhat happens is I don't get a negative though, I don't fear rejection, it is just shyness by itself! An intense feeling inside that makes me stay away from the girl. It would be great if I could find out the source of this. My shyness is so bad when I had to ring a person I almost rang the number a number of times, putting down the phone at the last number, then eventually getting to courage to ring. I can't stare at a girl for more than 1 second straight.

I need to meet new people alright. Here is my story (for Kazbadan):

I am not sure why I am shy, maybe cos of lack of experience with girls? I still haven't had my first kiss yet. I lost my mother to breast cancer when I was 3 and my Dad said I wasn't able to speak for months on end, and up to a year later I was asking where my mom was.

Anyway not speaking out obviously affected communications, and thus my development. I can remember being in Nursery (pre-school, around age 4) and I was always by myself. The other children used to play, but I was always by myself. I wasn't weird like. I can remember when I was 5 aswell and 2 boys that I played with, one of them whispered into the others ear saying for them to run away from me, and they did. That hurt a bit. When I wanted to play soccer (Futebol) the boys used to say no, we are playing 1V1, then another boy would come along and they'd play 1V1 and a goalie, and they'd say it's goalie and 1V1 now to me, they would never let me play.

Anyway for my education I was a bit overweight growing up, and this skinny dude used to always mock me, and I got in fights inside school aswell, even though I wasn't a trouble maker. The same happened in secondary school (junior high for americans), I used to get called names and people used to pick on me. I had some friends though, nice people, ones who wouldn't not pick on me. I was sociable to people I knew, I wasn't some loner in the corner, I was a happy child.

I dropped out of school in 5th year (1st year of high school for americans) after getting bullied, and continously harassed. I was offered multiple times a chance to fight fellas. The bullying hurt alright, I even carried a knife into school once cos I got affected so much. I didn't intend to use it, just for safety, but the school confiscated it and sent me home. When I left school I did nothing for 3 years straight. I'd be in home for weeks straight at the time, same 4 walls 24/7, only leaving to use the toilet and eat my dinner. Playing video games all the time. I went up to 18 and a half stone (13 and a half ATM) and was completely depressed. I moved out of home last year and am on the prozac and they revolutioned my way of thinking, it was like I was blind before, and I didn't notice it. I am starting to live my life again. From 15-18 was completely wasted. Maybe this story offers suggestions for why I am so shy?

I hope this post offers some info :)
I love you!

El-Bortukali

Quote from: runlola
Quote from: El-Bortukali


have fun reading this huge post ;D

oh and about the way I'm writing,blame it on runola,she's a bad influence  :razz:


WWWHATT???  :shock:
I am innocent.

btw, every human soul is valid regardless of IQ status. Please... I
have meet people with "low IQ's" that have great wisdom, creativity,
& talents that are much more interesting then boring scientists.  :roll:
Just because you have a high IQ doesn't mean you are the best, please.
Genius's are needed of course but a whole world of nothing but
them would be a nightmare to me. What snobbery!!


anyway, back to topic..


:offtopic:
no more talk of the superior race, yuk!


yes.you are talking about 'soul's I'm talking about 'bodies'

'boring'? science is not supposed to be 'fun' if it wasn't for those 'boring' scientists' we'd still live on the stone age.

of course I'm not the best if i have a High IQ.
there's always someone  smarter :)
i'm just more useful to mankind :)


QuoteGenius's are needed of course but a whole world of nothing but
them would be a nightmare to me. What snobbery!

but you wouldn't exist.so it wouldn't be a nightmare to you.or if you did,you'd exit on a body that  has a genetic code has good as them,so you wouldn't think that =)

Superior race?
oh i see,because we are more advanced/developed, than the humans of let's say 1000 years ago we 'are a superior race'?

...

there are no superior races,only steps of evolution.

but you're right.this kind of talk doesn't fit this thread.
discussing genetics vs 'souls' honestly,that's all very 'beautiful' but this is the physical plan,and on the plysical plan,the genes do matter,yes,a highly intelligent man,mating with a highly intelligent female, produces  a being at the same level of theirs,or on some cases,even genius.

on the spiritual plan,i dunno,and i don't care.I'll see when I'm dead.

matcombs,

QuoteWhat kind of philosophy is it for you to believe your genes aren't worth passing on?

what do you mean 'by philosophy'?
is it so bad for me to accept my low quality?

i am an extremely nervous individual,low IQ,and physically frail,there are cases of mentally ill in my family,my family is prone to violent outbursts,my mother side family has  stomach problemsetc.

now tell me,what right do i have to reproduce?seriously,i would only produce a low quality being,worst case,i could even produce an inferior version of me.

the Strong dominate the weak.
the Intelligent dominant the dumb.

about 'genetics' we  don't even need to do the manual work,of separation of genes,breed special qualities etc,true that we don't 'have' the capacity to do so,but ever heard of breeding faster horses,stronger etc?:)

guess what,we can do it on humans.

in fact,it has been done before.

goggle Sparta :)
that's how life is.

i know,i know,all that 'compassion' 'emotion' 'soul' is all very cute,but i don't live on the astral plane.I'm on a ruthless world :)

if i was an animal(humans are animals BTW) i would never have the opportunity to reproduce,because  i am no alpha male.
not even a dominant male :)
and it's not a really big issue,actually,i will eventually die and be reborn on one of those high quality bodies,so, i don't lose :)

oh and eugenics is not going to be 'the doom' of mankind.

mankind is already doomed :) too many humans,resources are getting deplected so fast,soon there won't be space or resources to sustain so many,then you will see eugenics at work :)


thanks for the attention :)

runlola,

Since you seem to love Nietzsche's quotes,here's one for ya:

"The magnitude of an 'advance' can be measured by the mass of things that had to be sacrificed to make it; mankind in the mass sacrificed to the prosperity of a single stronger species of man-that would be an advance."

 

                                         -Nietzsche,The Genealogy of Morals (2:2)

http://www.cbse.ucsc.edu/pdf_library/GeneModifEgal_Lopez061604.pdf




now,let's stop hijacking Donal's thread.. :redface:
Tá mo chroí istigh ionat

Donal

Does anyone have MSN so we can discuss this subject through it?
Now everybody wanna go to heaven but nobody want to die- Krayzie Bone

El-Bortukali

Quote from: DonalDoes anyone have MSN so we can discuss this subject through it?

check out your inbox
Tá mo chroí istigh ionat

Kazbadan

i say the same: check your inbox on astral  private messages.
I love you!

Namra

I have not and I am not going to read all these posts.

However, I will say this.  I am autistic.  I will assume that many of you have heard the term before but are unaware what an autistic really is.  On one aspect an autistic is a social retard.   Stastics show that an autistic that can effectively communicate with other people is about one in a million.

I was once very low on the autism spectrum.  Introverted to the extreme.  However a few chance events led me to being more social and then at one point I realized that I had a serious social issue and I FORCED myself to be more outgoing, now hardly anyone knows I am autistic unless I tell them.

The secret to being good socially is in practice and believing that you can do it.  Tell yourself you need this to survive because if you don't believe in it then you won't get anywhere.  Now, I have not had much success with women but for who I am I think I've done a great job but I always think about how I can always be better socially.  I also see myself being succesful before approaching someone.

I used to not even know the basics to starting a conversation with anyone.  To say "Hl" was foreign to me.  And, when I finally got to the point I could have a conversation I was basically saying.  "Hi, how are you?  What's your name?" and after that I had nothing else to say.

But, one day I realized I needed to socialize to make it in this world and get what I want and I imagined great social success with myself and with a lot of work I got it.

So, my best advice is know that you are a social success.  Know that you are going to meet the right woman and when you do, you will be succesful when talking to her.  It's that simple.  It may take some work.  But, I know it will work.
The Past, The Present, The Future, The Frunde