Did you pick your parents??

[kakkarot]

i'm still not sure what to believe about reincarnation, but i don't believe that we choose our parents. i've got great parents and i'm certainly thankful for that, but i doubt i had any choice in whom i was born to .

~kakkarot

[rhinegirl]

No! I do not beleive we choose much at all. I personally have met beings on the astral who readily admit they manipulate human life paths. When I asked why they simply stated "it's for the best" and became agitated when I demanded they answer me.

Jessica

quote:Originally posted by moontingle

You know that theory that when you were on the other side, waiting to reincarnate, you looked down to find parents who would help you grow and then reincarnated in the womb of the mother, along with your father's help, and they would teach you lessons.
     You know, so many of us are traumatized by what our parents did, or didn't do, so it's a big deal, it does have an effect on our lives.
Whether you hate or love your parents, do you think you chose them and why? And right or wrong, they did bring you into this world...
     My mom is native american Indian and my dad is Swiss. I don't know how they ever got together. My dad is cheap, cheap, and pretty serious, always wondering how to make money, and my mom would cook for the whole world and have huge parties regularly, if she could.
Yet, they get along. They love each other. They had some huge fights in their younger days, and I thought mom would walk out a few times, but she never did. And now, they're growing old together and I don't know what my dad would do without her.
Oh, and I do love them. They're cool.

[twstedrage]

I seriously doubt that too, my real dad was an abusive drug dealer, my mom is alright but was never there and well my step dad is not much better. I rose myself. If I had to choose, I would have choose parents that were alot better and more supportive of me.

[moontingle]

But, twstdrge, think about it. I know you didn't have a great time growing up, but how will you treat your own kids when you have some? You know what it's like to experience lack, so won't you shower love when it comes to be your chance to raise someone?

We learn better from what we didn't have, than from having it all our lives and taking it for granted.

You are a great person, an excellent thinker and you deserve better. Start by giving it to yourself, re-parent yourself, so to speak, and you'll have people who love you around you. They'll be attracted to you.

Heck, we here at astral pulse all love you. We're your family. You're brave for saying sometimes you feel rage, and I respect that. It takes guts. Some people don't want to look at their shadow side.

Love, Moon

[beavis]

Its likely that I did choose my parents because my whole family is psychic.

My dad and me have both been to different versions of reality / timelines / slightly parallel universe / whatever you want to call it, at one time or an other, but dad doesnt understand it that way. He just says that things can change, like a place could be there one day, then the next day it could have never been there.

I dont remember choosing, but if I had a choice, thats what I would have chosen.

[moontingle]

Beavis, you're so lucky to have parents like that. You're all psychic? You could be the Travelling Beavis Family Psychic Show.
Seriously, imagine the abilities you can have if your parents structure your belief systems right from birth that everything is possible. And they also teach you respect and how to handle your abilities humbly. I'm trying to teach my son thoughts come true, but he doesn't believe me. He's 10.
My friend taught his daughter she can make it rain. She can do it, because she was never told she couldn't!!!

And Rhinegirl, I can't believe other entities can direct our lives. Isn't there some kind of universal law being broken there?? Prod them a little more on it, they shouldn't get mad to discuss it.  Maybe the Greeks and their Gods were right!!! We are just pawns.

But, back to parents, you gotta love 'em. They brought you here!!

[rhinegirl]

quote:Originally posted by moontingle

But, back to parents, you gotta love 'em. They brought you here!!

No I don't!!!!![!][!][!][!][!][!]

Jessica

[kiya]

quote:Moontingle:
But, back to parents, you gotta love 'em.

Really? In which sense please, Moontingle?

I "got to" in the sense of => no choice, I'm forced to? Otherwise I'd break a moral law? I owe them gratitude for my life until I die?

Or in the sense of: I love them freely, by own choice - I would even love them if they were my neighbours, because they are so great as individuals and not merely because of their parental role?

In my case => I've thought a lot about "picking, being picked". My conclusion: thinking about the life tasks I've found out for myself => yes, I fear I picked them.
Kiya

[rhinegirl]

I refuse to love mine! The nazi wannabees can go kiss my arse.

Jessica

quote:Originally posted by kiya

quote:Moontingle:
But, back to parents, you gotta love 'em.

Really? In which sense please, Moontingle?

I "got to" in the sense of => no choice, I'm forced to? Otherwise I'd break a moral law? I owe them gratitude for my life until I die?

Or in the sense of: I love them freely, by own choice - I would even love them if they were my neighbours, because they are so great as individuals and not merely because of their parental role?

In my case => I've thought a lot about "picking, being picked". My conclusion: thinking about the life tasks I've found out for myself => yes, I fear I picked them.
Kiya

[kiya]

I gave up my refusal to love them a long time ago, Rhinegirl - but I do know (former) kids who had a happy childhood, a childhood where the young individual was treated with care and respect. These parents do exist - even if you and I had a different XP.

Why I gave up my refusal? Because I went into distance, am no longer entangled in futile fights. And from this distance I could see them clearer (and the role they played for my life tasks). BTW, if they were my neighbours, it would be easier => I'd just avoid them []
Kiya

[moontingle]

Now, you guys are making me think. I just threw that statement off: like, they are your parents, you're stuck with them. Not literally, but by blood. But, in rethinking this, no, you don't have to love them for what they did to you, but just love them by being nonjudgemental. If you carry their "lack of love" and all the hurt and anger that goes with that, then you carry on the chain of pain.

I do hypnotherapy with people who've been molested, by their parents. When they look into their parents' lives, they invariably see that their offending parent was molested, and their parents' parents' etc.

See, we have a choice to heal and refuse to carry the poison, or we can just feel hate and pass it on.

Hate can hold you prisoner. You don't have to "LOVE" them and show up with gifts, just wish them well and find another family, or, parent yourself and love yourself. I guess I'm talking about forgiveness. It's a big one to do sometimes, but then the person you forgive doesn't hold you down anymore.And you are free to feel love.

Just my thoughts ...

[kiya]

Thank you, Moontingle, for clarifying - I agree with your last thoughts now []
Kiya

[moontingle]

Nazi wannabees!! Holy! That is hard to take. I'm thinking if my parents were Ku Klux Klan, and promoted hatred, and thought they were the superior race, I'm not sure what I'd do. But, I'd have to understand the hatred started somewhere. There had to be a starting point. And, I would refuse to carry their hate. In fact, I'd go overboard being compassionate. Do you channel your anger at them in some positive way, rhinegirl? Or just refuse to admit they exist in your own life, like kiya? And what about your own kids, will you let them know about your parents?? Maybe you don't want to talk about it, but it can be healing to look at that shadow.

[kiya]

No, Moontingle, I don't pretend my parents don't exist in my life. They took a large part in influencing me in my childhood - I just let go, that's all. I don't fight them anymore - there is a difference IMO. []

Even if childhood was unpleasant in my case, I found out that I do have a choice as an adult => keep on fighting them, wasting my energy in hatred and constant "No's" or look into myself - see what I have taken from them, decide if I still "need" it or if I can modify it => making conscious decisions instead of passing on our family pattern.
Kiya

[Ramiel]

Everything about my life was chosen by me. My parents, family, and this excellent body. Its perfect for what I have to achieve in this lifetime, and I'm greatful I had the opportunity to take this body and the surrounding elements that make up my current life.

[Clow]

"Does the Walker choose the path, or does the path choose the walker."

I'm gonna add that to my qoutes. (Maybe I'm reading a bit to much Garth Nix)

[twstedrage]

True though I will be a hell of alot better parent just because I dont want to be like mine, and thanks for the compliments moontingle. Infact my parents were too busy and I rose my two little sisters, its funny they listen to me over my parents. Who knows though everything happens for a reason, maybe I did pick my parents or they were picked for me to prepair me for the tasks I have ahead.

[moontingle]

That's exactly what I meant Twsted, you raised your sisters. Wow! I am having a hard time raising my one son, and you raised two kids. And it sounds like they love you. there's a bigger picture here, and you may still have a lot more to gain from what you experienced as a child, the lack of having someone watch over you. Sounds like you had to grow up pretty quick. And hmmm. My dad used to drink, but having a drug dealer for a dad; man you could have followed him right into the pit, but you didn't. You are choosing a better path, for you and your sisters. You should give yourself credit for that!

I think I picked my parents to learn about being open-hearted. My dad is totally closed down, but my mom is open and loves people. I see the contrast and I don't want to live a small life worrying about money.

[findtruth]

If we did choose our life path, and I think that I had something to do with mine before I was born, then I probably did choose my parents. Mine are the type that think, if you feed the kid, send it to school, and make sure it stays out of trouble, they'll be fine. They're overprotective, they lie, and they don't know me, but they love me. Yet, considering I can actually see my type of planning in other twists of fate in my life, yeah I probably chose them and they're cool.  You have to give them credit. I'm eccentric and I probably would've thoroughly disturbed a different set of parents by now.  Because of them, I really don't give a d*mn about what other people think. It helps a lot.[|)]

[Nay]

It certaintly is a hard thing to swallow, thinking wow, I chose these people to raise me?  especially if you grew up or are growing up in a not so good of a atmosphere.  But like a couple of people on this thread I tend to think I chose everything I am going to go through in this life time.  I've learned some very good lessons so far in my life (and still doing so), I just hope I am using them to the upmost highest degree.

I was skimming through my Emmanuael's Book, this morning and came across this and think it is quite appropriate. []

You chose the childhood evironment
that was the most effective catalyst
to bring into focus those distortions
that you have selected to work on
in this lifetime.
It is a masterpiece fo planning,
constsruction and tactic
that you have put into forming your body,
your mind and your emotions.
Trust the wisdom of your soul
that chose the infant circumstances
that formulated your concept of life.

This rings so true for me....

Nay

[findtruth]

Cool.  That's somewhat along the same lines of what I was thinking, though they stated it much better.

[Rob]

I'm not really confortable with the idea of consciously choosing, but hey that could be a factor, I dunno. Others might be your natural energy level (like attracts like, but also opposites...ug), karma, soul ties from previous incarnations, your life's mission (if you have one), and maybe a few random throws of the dice (or maybe it just seems that way). And all this being directed by the divine mind...
The concept for reincarnation I have in my head is like the soul purifying itself and eventually loosing the lower levels (intergrated upwards anyway - they live on a higher level up on the spirit plane so low level personality stuff becomes redundant). Then they get drawn in by the divine breath and blown back out again into a new body, and an clean mind.

Rob

[jilola]

The way I see it is that we don't choose our parents but rather the lessons and to some extent the circumstances in our future life.
The details aren't important since the way we learn the lessons can vary drastically depending upon the person's level of previous learning and current understanding.
Also, the tern REincarnation seems misleading since we, afterall, are born in a new life and not a repetition of a previous one.

2cents & L&L
Jouni

[moontingle]

You know that theory that when you were on the other side, waiting to reincarnate, you looked down to find parents who would help you grow and then reincarnated in the womb of the mother, along with your father's help, and they would teach you lessons.
     You know, so many of us are traumatized by what our parents did, or didn't do, so it's a big deal, it does have an effect on our lives.
Whether you hate or love your parents, do you think you chose them and why? And right or wrong, they did bring you into this world...
     My mom is native american Indian and my dad is Swiss. I don't know how they ever got together. My dad is cheap, cheap, and pretty serious, always wondering how to make money, and my mom would cook for the whole world and have huge parties regularly, if she could.
Yet, they get along. They love each other. They had some huge fights in their younger days, and I thought mom would walk out a few times, but she never did. And now, they're growing old together and I don't know what my dad would do without her.
Oh, and I do love them. They're cool.