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no need to feel worried or nervous here (i hope). i have also posted some personal stuff that could easily get me thrown in the psycho ward, as have many others here. if anyone does criticize you, just wait until everybody else starts picking on that person    just kidding.

yes, many others have had spiritual experiences like yours. heck, the experience you posted was almost exactly like one i had that i can't recall if i have posted it here or not. but i was in a park somewhere pondering the "truths of life" when i realized something completely destructive to my soul and i started weeping and bawling and crying for what seemed like forever, but was probably only two or three minutes. i also felt a pain in my chest that was so intense that it felt like it would melt my chest. when it was all over, i never thought to look for a mark (because i was preoccupied with what dropped the pain, which i think i did post somewhere in here).

if you aren't interested in the metaphysical yet, when you read through many of the posts here, you will probably be curious at least. kinda like the first step in a long journey. hope you make it to the end.

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

the Spirit Web as i call it. well, actually i don't. my theory so far is that spiritual energy isn't on the physical plane of existance (duh), even though spiritual energy can affect the physical plane. i think it travels through what has been talked about through the ages as the "spirit world". this may be the astral, or it may be a different place all-together: who cares. it works and that's really all you need to know  . and it isn't limited by distance either. some people have even talked about sending energy back and forth in time; now that's weird!  

just focus on the person, and send them energy, then contact them (preferrably immediately, so that they remember it happened when you talk to them) to confirm that they got it. after you get more experience and are more confident that it is getting there when you think it is, you will stop having to confirm "in person".

on the internet, over the phone, in a chat room, it doesn't matter. just focus on the person (their complete identity; the very core of their spirit; their energy pattern/signature; whatever works for you) and try releasing energy to them.

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

cainam: before bed, meditate. when you are meditating and relaxed, "calm" your energy. grab it, move it up and then down your torso once, and then get it to relax the same way you get your body to relax: will it to happen.

and if you really need to, try releasing your extra energy into something for storage later. many people use crystals and such to store energy, but i have realized an even better storage device! a household plant. it is living and will certainly hold the energy, plus it will do the plant good to have the extra energy, even if it is for only a few hours each day(night). and it also gives you a reason to get a plant or two in your house if you don't already have one  

your problem was that you can't sleep at night because your energy is too active, right?

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

AAAHHH!!! YOU'VE FOUND ME!! D'OH! NOW I HAVE TO HIDE AGAIN!!!!

*run's away and hides*  

~kakkarot

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try getting a space heater and pointing it directly at yourself  

~kakkarot

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you can try the chat room at the celestinevision.com website: when i went there, the people were nice.

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

so the topic is "Why Not Just Shield?", but i started thinking, "Why Not Just Fight Back?".

it seems that most of the people who are talking about using shields seem to think that the shield stops any possibility of a fight dead in its tracks. but as Astrocio said, when he went up against a demon, his shields were worthless. so why not use the shields as they are used in the real world: a means of defense to allow you to counter attack? rather than just sitting inside your shield and hoping your shield will protect you, why not fight back as well? this is why i don't shield: i just attack the thing and then protect myself DURING the fights whenever i feel that i should protect myself.

kakkarot on the White Light shields (hey, these are comfy. i wonder if they make mattresses out of them.    )
"As I understand it, "plain" white light is not sufficent for a shield" ~Ides; i agree, i think the white light has to be an 'active' or radiant kind of light. for some reason i hold contempt for these kinds of shields. i think they are too defensive and they tend to make the person inert the confrontation. if something is attacking you, i don't think you should just defend against it once or twice when it attacks and then hope it will go away and never come back. i know they work (i've used them), but its like taking the easy way out, and you don't get any good combative experience out of the confrontation.

kakkarot on running water (funny, i couldn't walk on water yesterday...    )
take a shower when you feel lousy; don't you feel good afterwards? even a cold shower feels good: but why? is it because it is getting rid of negs and combatting psychic/spiritual attacks for you, or is it just relaxing or invigorating your body? i don't know. but i think the running water shield has to do with the natural energy that it holds and carries with it, that prevents some spiritual being from 'crossing' it and helps deflect "negative" attacks. and also, when you take a shower, you body absorbs water (rehydrating itself) and that energy as well which are both good for you.


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~kakkarot, the goofy vampire      <-- dulled tooth  

Secret of Secrets

is it kind of like the voices are speaking the "truth" about what you think of things? and sometimes, you hear voices that "couldn't possibly be your own" because they speak in ways you don't and with knowledge you don't possess?

like when someone you don't like walks into the room, a voice mutters disgustedly "That guy is a(n) [explitive]. I hate him", or when you start thinking of doing something that you believe is "wrong" and a voice says something like "You shouldn't do that. It'll come back to bite you later"? or if you just aren't really thinking of anything (or it might be that you are focusing completely on one thing) and you hear a voice just up and say "So and so isn't feeling well" and they name a person you hadn't even thought about for days, or

if this is what you are experiencing, then i think it might be a combination of an undisciplined mind combined with untrained (and unknown) telepathic reception. this reception might be from other people, or might be from spirits, but it is often difficult, or completely impossible, to distinguish from your own mental voices, until you learn "know yourself" and know what your own mental, or "inner", voice(s) sounds like.

what i described about happened to me for a while. until i started attacking the voices and started trying to feel other "presences" around me. when i started attacking vile (has anybody noticed that vile and evil are the same except the "e" is moved from the back to the front of the word?) beings and started sorting through the voices that remained to find out why they were talking to me, i figured out that most of it was just my mind telling me what i wanted to think unconsciously but that i consciously didn't want to think. if you understand that. like not wanting to hate people, but still hating them, and instead of allowing myself to hate them the voices told me what i didn't want to think.

is that right, or am i waaaaaaay off?  

happy gopher hunting season everyone!    j/k
~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

ok, first off i am going to have to defend christianity. Christianity is not supposed to be a religion, it is supposed to be a way of live: of loving people. next, unfortunately most people who claim the title Christian have NO CLUE as to what it really means to be christian; they really do think it is supposed to be a religion. and more unfortunately, most people who have figured out the difference either stay away from churches or stay quiet at the churches, so it is highly unlikely you will ever find one so that you can learn REAL christianity from them. HOWEVER, real christianity can be learned right from the bible. screw listening to people to hear how they are biased in the ways of "interpreting" the bible. read it yourself, discarding bias and what you have "learned" from people, and then you will see what christianity really is.
DONE DEFENDING CHRISTIANITY.

i tore apart anything even resembling a belief system, starting when i was fourteen and ending when i was almost sixteen. cleaned out everything. i even went so far as to ask myself whether reality really was real, or if it wasn't and then ANSWER it COMPLETELY (however, it was not just a yes or no answer) rather than just defaulting to something like "well, if it isn't then... whatever". i had to in order to make sure i was believing in things that i could trust myself to believe in.

the hardest part about tearing apart your beliefs and building new ones is that you have to fully answer every question you pose yourself and you almost have to ask yourself everything just to make sure you aren't pulling in beliefs from what you used to believe in without testing them first. and the other thing is, not all of your answers will be yes or no answers, and not all of your answers will be answerable. "Does God exist?" not a simple yes or no answer if you want to make that decision in all truth, is it? after all, no one will prove God to exist to you except God. Even if God has proven his existance to another, that person cannot share that experience with you: the best you could do would be to believe or disbelieve in their ability to distinguish truth from fiction. and if you would believe them without fact, then why not believe someone else without fact? and that means that to know something, you have to experience it fully for yourself.

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eg) "Do angels exist?" i believe in them due to the experiences i have had in my life time, but i cannot yet declare them, in my own mind, to be factually existant. never have i had an experiece that has forced me to know that angels exist, but i have had so many experiences that have a 'most probable answer' being that they do exist, that i have to, in an unbiased and fair judgement call, believe that it is possible they exist and that they do things.

eg) "Does the ground underneath my feet exist?" Well, for every test and experience i have had with the ground being there, when it has come into question as to whether it is there or not, has proven it to have been there. Therefore, in an unbiased and fair judgement call, i can do nothing but believe that, even if the world is imaginary, that i can continue to put faith into the idea that everytime that i wish to interact with the thought known as the ground, with all of the properties of "ground", i will be able to interact with the "ground" in the manners that i have proven to myself to be able to interact with it in.
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~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

reiki master: try burning them out. you use energy, right? focus as much of that energy into your stomach, then cut off your connection to your source of external energy (so there is no possibility of backlash and you can concentrate on only one thing instead of two) and then have the energy burn out everything from your spirit. i warn you that this should hurt spiritually: a lot. it may even hurt physically depending on how much energy you use and how you burn it.

burn the entire area of your energy and spirit to destroy anything that feels "funny" (anything that feels like it isn't a part of you or your aura or your energy.). a "neg" might be able to disguise itself so that it feels like it is part of you, so start burning everything that feels even the least bit suspicious, and stop burning it if you feel it hurting you while not hurting something else as well. when you are burning things that are attached to you spiritually, it may hurt you spiritually as well, which is why you have to keep your perception open to feel if something else is in pain as well.

if you think you have a spirit-guide/guardian-angel/something-like-that, tell it to get away from you when you are doing this so that it doesn't get burned and so that it also doesn't mess with your sensing of other beings.

and on a side note: if you use this method to affect your physical body you should be able to destroy things that are physically ailing you (but the pain will be much more physical in nature and will probably be more intensified. so use caution.) i have only used this method twice because i have only needed to use it twice. the first time i burned out absolutely everything from my system, including the cold virus that is supposedly undestroyable (but the very next day i caught the cold with a vengance because my immune system was unprepared (first day in my life where i was actually bed-ridden not by choice)). and the second time i used it i almost did the same thing until i realized i was getting rid of the cold virus; i stopped before getting rid of all of it, but it still came back fairly hard the next day and took nearly two weeks for a full recovery. and i don't get sick very often (once every year or two).




sahlyn: "My question then is 'If someone got close enough to you so as to be within this boundary (say a psi vampire sat next to you on the bus) would they then be free to feed away on your energy, no matter how solid your shield was?" move your shield. the shield is not an inflexible thing unless you design it so and never change its design. if you don't make it rigid, then you you should be able to move it by simple mental or spiritual command.


ides: "Can you make the direct connection to divinity?" yes, but i have cut myself off from that power, for a reason which i would rather not disclose.

"I am pretty unknowledgeable about your sources of energy, but I get from your posts that it is more like a "life force" thing than anything else." that is pretty much most of it.

"There are ways to tap into constant energy, where you only need to check things, and expend a very small part of your own energy (maybe none at all) to maintain the shield." unfortunately, in calgary there isn't much energy at all, even in the areas of "high" concentrations of energy. so this isn't a very good idea for this location. otherwise, that is what i probably would do if i shielded.

"I am sure there are people that know ways that suit your system better, but I would recomend the Qabbilistic Cross to you. If you got this down, you should be able to overcome a lot (or all) of the energy starvation problems you encounter. Plus this can be used to channel continous energy into things like shields." thanks for the advice, and i will look into the qabbalistic cross thing, but i don't think i will be using it. i am very certain that my time in calgary is supposed to happen so that i get three things out of it: the first being greater control over my power at low levels so that i will be used to it and so that when i go back to having lots of energy i will be even more powerful than i currently am; the second being a greater understanding of why i should not get "power-mad" or "power-hungry"; and the third is actual control over dark ki because that is one of the most powerful forms of energy that i have yet encountered and i am very certain that i will be using it in certain times, meaning i will have to be able to control it.


tracy: "And what about those attacks that you aren't even aware of causing damage to your chakras and energy systems and other vital areas." i am aware of myself very keenly so i don't have to worry about this. but i can see how this would apply to others and is definately a good argument as to why one should shield.

"Since shields are made of positive energies". also, while i am sure that many people like to use "positive" energy to create/maintain their shields, a shield does not have to use positive energy. if i had greater control over the dark ki i am sure i could make an incredibly powerful shield out of that. and i also know that many people use shields made out of neutral energy (neither positive nor negative) because most peoples' "personal" energy is neutral-ish and many people use their personal energy to create shields.



shielding techniques are many and varied. but i still like to feel my environment and act in accordance with it than to shut myself off from it out of fear or paranoia.    but that's just me!  

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

it's possible. in fact there are some who claim that holy places or other very spiritual places can keep spirits out. there are a few (i think... two?) churches that i have been to where i have felt the same thing as you are talking about chamos. but one of those churches is abandoned. weird, eh?

they may be planning something. but it would be no different than if they were planning something when you might be vulnerable too.

but that is only one possible answer. and after all, is there anything in this world that can only be done in only one way?

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

thanks again for the new replies, and there has been an update on the picture. i spent some time in relaxation and rest, then i went back to trying to "listen" to find out if i could finish the drawing. i got some more of the picture, and even though it still doesn't feel perfect, it does feel almost perfect.

i will try to put up the new image within a week or two.

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

ides: as long as it is only my tail, i can still fight back with my claws and teeth, right?    or run the heck away if i REALLY have to.

but still, i view shielding to be part of fighting (unless you are shielding for a more mundane reason, like because you are a very sensitive type and you shield to prevent an overload of emotions surging through you in crowded areas) so why bother until you actually do encounter a fight? i view it as a waste of time and energy to do things you don't need to. train to get really good at raising shields quickly, then you really don't need to worry much. and, luckily enough, it doesn't take much time, for most people, to learn how to shield quickly.

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

i had that too, inexplicable fear of something that wasn't there. i used to think that maybe a killer would come into my room and kill me in my sleep. or that a monster would appear and attack me. night after night for a couple of weeks. then i finally decided that i would put my faith to the test and just trust in God to protect me. i prayed to God to protect me, or to let me die if that was his will. i then cast off the fear and went to bed, and it hasn't bothered me since (this was just three or four years ago). you may not have faith in a diety or anything, so i strongly suggest you find out ways to shield your room effectively, and if you ever see those jerk spirits again, destroy them.

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

have you seen a doctor yet? see one. the doctor might be able to do something to get rid of the problem. after all, if a spiritual being can affect you physically then the physical doctor (and any physical medication or treatment prescribed) can affect the "neg". "it's so crazy, it might just work"

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

mcarthur said: "People generally only start to think about shielding *after* having realized they have a neg problem." you're probably right, but for myself, i realized that it would take longer to develop attacking capabilities than defensive ones, so i developed defensive capabilities first. plus i was still going through the "am i insane or is this really happening" stage    , so i would think i was less insane by trying to defend myself than by trying to figure out it this stuff was real.

funny thing is, i don't even shield now!  :p  i just take life as it comes, deal with the crap and enjoy the joy. i gained a lot of power and skill in the martial arts and i used the training to help me become more powerful using energy and being able to attack spiritual beings that attacked me. me fierce tiger, not some lame housecat    .

my philosophy is that you shouldn't block out life and pretend it isn't there (and yes, i know you aren't pretending it isn't by using shielding), but that you should have fun when it comes to you and stick it through the bad times because you can then help others through similar experiences when they go through it.

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

hey all, it's been a while. the school has been playing musical chairs with their generic accounts (since i'm not going to school right now, my account is disabled so the generic accounts are my only means of using the net). i finally got in today though. saw this topic and thought i'd post some of my own experiences.

as i was growing up i continued to become more and more sensitive to spiritual beings (what you guys call negs, as well as neutral beings and goodly beings). it was really weird and for a long time i thought i was just somewhat insane. i would just feel spirits moving through me or around me, usually within ten feet or so. sometimes i "felt" their thoughts or feelings and other times i only felt something pass through me.

as i stockpiled more and more chi energy, though, it seemed like i was more and more under attack by evil spirits. however, this could also be explained because this was also the time i was becoming a very strong christian, so they may have been attacking me because of my strong faith. but later, when i moved to calgary and ran out of most of my chi (and i still have very little chi comparitively) the attacks stopped. even when my faith was wavering at times the attacks continued, but they seemed to increase most when i was using lots of energy. and now that i have very little, i haven't seen a strong attack in nearly a year.

it seems to me that they are able to home in on your energy and start harassing you because of it. i don't know why, but this is what i have been able to figure out from my experiences.

as to some of your questions:
1) i agree with mcarthur
2) if they attacked you, they could do anything from making a point in your body hurt, to (this next point is argued by some people, but since i have experienced it i know it is possible) possessing you and doing bad things to you. (schitzophrenia)
3) imo, yes, if it is only against "negs". to defend against humans and certain spiritual beings, other shields would be better.
4) most likely.
5) yes. i don't project.
6) being aware spiritually helps. being able to project makes you more sensitive spiritually, so this should help.

~kakkarot











Secret of Secrets

try directing that sloshing to your back (the area that is messed up). it may be your energy rather than your spirit that is moving around.

Secret of Secrets

"believe nothing until you experience it yourself; this way you will believe nothing that is not real."

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

"36 Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?" 37 And he said to him, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind. 38 This is the great and first commandment. 39 And a second is like it, You shall love your neighbor as yourself. 40 On these two commandments depend all the law and the prophets."  -Matthew 22:36-40.

Do what you will, but do it in love: i am sure that this is what God wants his people to know.

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

what's a manuscript?    (really, i don't know!)

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

i'm going to have to agree with adam: whether it is a neg or not, your wife must take responsibility for her own body and her own actions. if she isn't in control of herself, then she should be. help her to become in control of herself; whether you have to get rid of an external influence or resolve and internal influence, she still needs help.

so try doing both methods; 1) try to get rid of a "neg" and 2) get counseling.

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

comus: have you tried praying? i am in a constant state of depression from having to live in this world too, and there have been times when i told God bluntly that unless he did something (and i was specific each time) by a certain time, then i would kill myself because it would be easier that way. and yet, i am still alive today (but be warned that each time i did this, it was only at or near the very end of the time limit that it happened).

and don't worry if you think you are dumb and socially inept. i was socially inept in high school and it was only during the past year that i really gained any social skills at all (but i'm still alone). and if you think you are dumb, start reading stuff; fiction, science, magazines about the world: everything. you will learn lots from books.

and i especially recommend the dragonlance series that follows the group that includes Tanis Halfelven, the brothers Majere, the kender Tasslehoff, the dwarf Flint, Kitiara, and Sturm (or was it strum?). they are really good books that give you a lot to think about and lots of ideas about life. try them

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets

sorry jilola, but it's a distortion of space, not time. or a hallucination!  

~kakkarot

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thanks chohan, that's much clearer. and thanks ides, too, for your post.

great thoughts and discussion, guys. and i think i am done with this thread, so if anyone wants to use it to talk about something regarding magic and christianity (peeves, ideas, thoughts, opinions, personal experiences or practices, etc), GO AHEAD! have fun.

~kakkarot

Secret of Secrets