am I a guru ?

James S · May 31, 2004, 05:06:43

Are you a guru?

Hmmm.....ok, answer these questions:

1)Has it been revealed to you by higher sources that you are now required to take vast sums of money from as many suck...er...sorry...followers as possible?

2)Has it been revealed to you by higher sources that you are required to have sex with as many of your female followers as possible?

3)If one of the female followers from question 2 should become pregnant, do you plan to have a really good lawyer among your following that can confidently get you out of any potential paternity law suites?

4)Do you believe you have the ability to go for a minimum of one month without bathing?

Ok, if you can answer yes to any or all of the first three questions, well...you might just be qualified to be a TV evangelist. But if you can answer yes to question 4 as well, then my friend - you have the makings of a guru.

[

]
James.

weetabix · May 31, 2004, 19:42:48

[

] no..

So, Truth will remain to the real seekers.

-Weeta

wantsumrice · May 31, 2004, 20:01:55

A guru doesn't ask, if he is a guru. [

]

James S · May 31, 2004, 20:44:28

That's a shame wheetabix.
So which one was a problem for you? The bathing once a month thing? Yes I can understand that. Oh well, you could still try for TV evangelist. [

][

]

- James.

kiauma · May 31, 2004, 20:58:15

ROFL!

weetabix · May 31, 2004, 21:26:06

Well, not exactely. It's more about the lawyer.. my higher source told me to kill them all when it will happen and start again with more "pure" followers [}:)]

Shame on me ! Does somebody will get the point !?
Should I (and How could I) make my topic more attracting ?

-Weeta

wantsumrice · May 31, 2004, 21:41:28

Kiamu, please refrain from 5 letter posts. There is a minimum of 6 letters, or one sentence per post. Unless the letters under the required minimum stand for a sentence that conveys something meaningful. [

!]

~ivan

Moonburn33 · May 31, 2004, 22:10:05

a guru is the indian version of a televangelist. lots of supposed miracles, fornication, rumours of child abuse and money! money!

don't be a guru. strive to learn about yourself

there is ALWAYS a bigger fish.

James S · May 31, 2004, 23:38:40

Ahhh, thank you Weetabix. Now I understand.

I don't see a problem with your idea at all.
In fact killing them all would prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that you're a TRUE guru! [}:)]
[

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Mystic Cloud · June 02, 2004, 14:42:21

So tell me what is Spirituality?

James S · June 02, 2004, 16:45:31

quote:
Originally posted by Mystic Cloud

So tell me what is Spirituality?

Huh?
Spirituality??
We're talking about Guru's here. What's spirituality got to do with Gurus[?]
[

][

]

- James.

weetabix · June 02, 2004, 19:53:56

No my friend, Mystic Cloud has all right !
A guru will have all the answers.

So... Don't you have a dictionnary !?
No !? Well... ok I will help you. Spirituality is all what refer to the mind, the mental. We could say consciousness. Your body is created by your conscience and when you tempt to go behind this illusion, it's what we call spirituality. So now, my disciple, you can repeat to your-self : "I am". Nothing less, nothing more (for the moment). Goes in peace !

[

]
-Weeta

wantsumrice · June 02, 2004, 20:08:00

Please, weetabix, get a dictionary (not dictionnary) yourself, then think about learning, before teaching. [

]

~ivan

timeless · June 02, 2004, 20:24:34

Dear Weetabix,

Guru's 'generally' place themselves in authority giving people a series of 'rules' and 'strict methods' to follow. This may explain why some people react negatively to the word 'guru'. Churches do similar things. Often people jump out of religion and churches only to jump into a guru's backpocket. It looks all new and wonderful because the rules are new and different but essentially little has changed. We are still being told by an 'authority' how to think and behave. And some of the new guru rules can be very scary like the sex thing James mentioned.[B)]

Perhaps a good question to ask is, Why should people feel they need a guru? There are so many methods to help with meditation, energy raising, self-reflection and self actualization written by countless people, written in countless ways that I wonder if there is much left to even teach these days? Is it more a matter of finding a method that suits us and, "Just do it!" again and again without getting discouraged? Getting in the habit of practicing a method we choose can be tough -- It's even tougher than getting in the habit of going to the gym. At least when we go to the gym we can see our progress physically. With spritual methods the progress can seem so gradual we don't notice it and often give up too soon. Someone to talk to for encouragement is nice but preferably not an authority who will order us to do such and such(a method that may not suit us at all). Rather a friend who will listen and help us bounce around some ideas until we get settled again.

Further, why take a guru's word about higher worlds when we can get their ourselves with practice. Without experiencing things ourselves, what the guru says is just a new belief -- a new belief replacing an old perhaps less attractive belief. The only way to really know for sure is to experience things ourselves. That is what most people are after I think? -- Not finding new beliefs but rather finding new meaningful direct experiences.

Best Wishes to you,
timeless

weetabix · June 02, 2004, 20:46:52

Oups... in French, there's two "n" [xx(]

You do not like my explanation ? Teaching is a way to learn too ! Think about it [

]

Timeless, thanks ! You encourage me to continue going to the gym... [

] I hope you all see "absurdity" of my topic, but I'll go ahead with it. You ask : "Perhaps a good question to ask is, Why should people feel they need a guru?". Because they don't want to go to the gym... So they buy anything which could avoiding them to go for (ouf, I'm not sure of this sentence[:I]). Trust me, I know for my-self... Do we say idleness !?

Truly,
-Weeta

James S · June 02, 2004, 20:57:50

quote:
Originally posted by weetabix
You ask : "Perhaps a good question to ask is, Why should people feel they need a guru?". Because they don't want to go to the gym... So they buy anything which could avoiding them to go for (ouf, I'm not sure of this sentence[:I]). Trust me, I know for my-self... Do we say idleness !?

LOL!! Thats GREAT!![

] Excellent answer!
Yes, go to your local Guru and book yourself in for a two day course in Shamanism. LOL.

You are also very much correct when you say that teaching is a way to learn - a very good way!
A good line from Phil Collin's song - Son Of Man from Disney's Tarzan soundtrack -
"In learning you will teach
And in teaching you will learn"

So true. (with exception to some Uni lecturers I've known who are so set in their way's they never learn [B)])

[

]
James.

timeless · June 02, 2004, 22:45:08

Dear Weetabix,

Perhaps I didn't give the best example. I would like to recommend swimming instead of the gym. Swimming gives a great overall body work out with much less stress on the joints. It also feels less like going to the meat market! I love hitting the water each day as long as I avoid the high diving board.[:O] Ouch!

Sorry for not getting the thread.[

]

How much we learn is inversely proportion to how much of an authority we think we are. If you are teaching to learn I would say you are not much of guru. I get the impression this will be good news that you already knew.[

]

Best Regards,
timeless

weetabix · May 30, 2004, 21:41:22

I think I have an high understanding of universe [:O] And I would enroll some of you into a discussion about it...

Do not PM me, I want a big and transparency one !

Come to "Frank Hatem's Hyperscience"'s topic
http://www.astralpulse.com/forums/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=12265

-Weeta

(Did I read too much about "The Omni Dragons" discussion !? [

])

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am I a guru ?