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Social Anxiety

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Lucids

I don't know that this is even really in the right place or anything to heal first off.

I have terrible social anxiety.  I'm fine with friends/family at home or public places.  But in the work place I have a terrible time with social anxiety that almost paralyzes me.  I will sweat out a shirt, my body heat gets extreme I almost tremble when talking to other co-workers or a conference call or during meetings.  It's like my body shuts down. 

Any chance we could experiment with this?  I would like to document daily/weekly/monthly results on this and see if it can be improved.

Bordmb

#1
I'll send my thoughts your way. I used to have this problem in school and found that one day something clicked and I gained the mentality of, "Really, what's the worst that can happen? It's not like they're going to hurt me."

Lucids

Thanks I appreciate that. I think the same thing but when it comes time for one of the situations I lose control. 

Barnowl

Well done for your honesty. I had the same things years ago. Was part of my, 'autism' when I was a kid.

In truth, working in a high pressure call centre, taking complaints every day has helped me come to terms (to a degree...)

What really did it was constant meditation and especially EFT

EFT is absolutely brilliant for stuff like this, as it helps remove the fear, and dissipates it. I've used it for job interviews, meetings, and generally social situations.

Meditation helps with the breathing, which in my case, allows me to speak properly and confidently.

I'll post an EFT video. Hopefully this will help

http://www.tapping.com/

Try this. This should help diffuse any nervous energy :-)
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O.O.P

You must learn the art of focusing your attention(concentration) to the present moment rather than continously thinking about this or that. Its not easy, but its the only way to transform the suffering. The normal human way of living (which is 99 percent of human population) is completely insane and in the long term its 1 billion times harder than practising mindfulness.

A life without stress, anxiety, sorrow, regret, anger, violence is possible.


Kirkland

I'm in a similar situation I have social anxiety, general anxiety and depression. My social anxiety is so bad that I can't phone people only text people. I have tried tapping which hasn't been successful, meditation on the other hand depending how busy my mind is works quite well.

So far for me (I don't know if it will work for you) is confronting my fears but doing that step by step. I don't jump into the deep end because I know that will end in disaster and will give me more bad memories and more anxiety leading to a self fulfilling prophecy. 

Neither do you need to face it alone you have friends who support you. I don't really have friends due to my anxieties but I have a councilor whom supports me and tries to push me. You can always set a goal and ask your friends to help you attain those goals by pushing you.

Either way at the end of the day though it is up to you to change and to challenge yourself despite the fear unless you want to go to the Dr and get medication to deal with it and even then that is not certain to help and has many side effects. If your in the UK they can put you on the waiting list for an NHS councilor but the waiting list is in many cases huge so I wouldn't put too much hope in that.

O.O.P



Lionheart

Quote from: O.O.P on August 06, 2012, 10:03:05
This video may help both you and me my friend
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMVpidwdMd8&feature=related
Very nice!  :-) Thank you for sharing this with us. It made my day!  :-)

O.O.P

Thanks NoY, Lionheart. I'm glad you enjoyed it

KarmicBeats

Quote from: O.O.P on August 06, 2012, 10:03:05
This video may help both you and me my friend
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMVpidwdMd8&feature=related
Great video I gave it a thumbs up :-)

I have some videos that may be of use here.  I have some on Anxiety and some on Shyness.

There are 3 versions of the shyness video, same audio just different nature sounds or no nature sounds:

Shyness I
http://youtu.be/izan3b_YjNc

Shyness I + RAIN
http://youtu.be/3lnfVUmFSG8

Shyness I + WIND & RAIN
http://youtu.be/7chVGpYZNf4

There are two versions of the Anxiety video:

Anxiety I (Binaural & Isochronic beats for Anxiety and depression. Delta 3.5Hz)
http://youtu.be/QKlMTQesq7g

Anxiety I + Rain (Binaural & Isochronic beats for Anxiety & depression. Delta 3.5Hz)
http://youtu.be/SagNHkZ3Tsk

In the evening before bed do a breath meditation with an anxiety video. Breath meditation at Karmic Beats Blog:
http://karmicbeats.blogspot.com/p/basic-breath-meditation.html

Use the Shyness videos in the morning as 10Hz is Alpha range and that is good for a state of alert mind & relaxed body.

Do these videos everyday for at least a month.

Here is the meditation that goes with the Shyness video (It is in the video as well):

This meditation has just four affirmations to keep it simple and focused.  Repeat these affirmations to yourself during the day as well.

Find a comfortable place and close your eyes.
Relax.
Listen to the beats and focus on your breathing.
Breathe in relaxing, positive energy.
Breathe out tension and negative energy.
Focus on your breath and the beats.
If your mind wanders acknowledge the thoughts and bring your awareness back to your breath and the beats.

Do this for a few minutes until you are relaxed.

Think of things you are grateful for.  Think of positive social interactions that you have had.

Feel grateful for these things.

Repeat the following out loud a few times, then whisper a few times then keep repeating it silently.

I am grateful for what I have.
I am aware of my negative feelings, and I can let them go.
I am outgoing.    
I am relaxed, easygoing, and social.

Do this for a few to several minutes.

Then bring your awareness back to your breath and the beats.

If your mind wanders acknowledge the thoughts, repeat the affirmations and bring your awareness back to your breath and the beats.

Do this for as long as you can.  Do not over do it.  A short daily meditation is better than a long weekly one.

When you are finished bring your awareness back to the room and open your eyes.
Karmic Beats provides free binaural, isochronic beats, ASMR, videos for astral projection, lucid dreaming, study & focus, healing and other meditations.
https://www.youtube.com/user/MrKlawdek

Fractal art wallpaper at blog:
http://karmicbeats.blogspot

O.O.P

#11
Cool videos. I was listening  these kind of mind-relaxing musics 1.5 years ago, it can help to clear the mind. It can be helpful to gain the energy to continue the practise in the daily life as well.

Barnowl

Quote from: KarmicBeats on September 10, 2012, 13:49:50
Great video I gave it a thumbs up :-)

I have some videos that may be of use here.  I have some on Anxiety and some on Shyness.

There are 3 versions of the shyness video, same audio just different nature sounds or no nature sounds:

Shyness I
http://youtu.be/izan3b_YjNc

Shyness I + RAIN
http://youtu.be/3lnfVUmFSG8

Shyness I + WIND & RAIN
http://youtu.be/7chVGpYZNf4

There are two versions of the Anxiety video:

Anxiety I (Binaural & Isochronic beats for Anxiety and depression. Delta 3.5Hz)
http://youtu.be/QKlMTQesq7g

Anxiety I + Rain (Binaural & Isochronic beats for Anxiety & depression. Delta 3.5Hz)
http://youtu.be/SagNHkZ3Tsk

In the evening before bed do a breath meditation with an anxiety video. Breath meditation at Karmic Beats Blog:
http://karmicbeats.blogspot.com/p/basic-breath-meditation.html

Use the Shyness videos in the morning as 10Hz is Alpha range and that is good for a state of alert mind & relaxed body.

Do these videos everyday for at least a month.

Here is the meditation that goes with the Shyness video (It is in the video as well):

This meditation has just four affirmations to keep it simple and focused.  Repeat these affirmations to yourself during the day as well.

Find a comfortable place and close your eyes.
Relax.
Listen to the beats and focus on your breathing.
Breathe in relaxing, positive energy.
Breathe out tension and negative energy.
Focus on your breath and the beats.
If your mind wanders acknowledge the thoughts and bring your awareness back to your breath and the beats.

Do this for a few minutes until you are relaxed.

Think of things you are grateful for.  Think of positive social interactions that you have had.

Feel grateful for these things.

Repeat the following out loud a few times, then whisper a few times then keep repeating it silently.

I am grateful for what I have.
I am aware of my negative feelings, and I can let them go.
I am outgoing.    
I am relaxed, easygoing, and social.

Do this for a few to several minutes.

Then bring your awareness back to your breath and the beats.

If your mind wanders acknowledge the thoughts, repeat the affirmations and bring your awareness back to your breath and the beats.

Do this for as long as you can.  Do not over do it.  A short daily meditation is better than a long weekly one.

When you are finished bring your awareness back to the room and open your eyes.


That looks great... I'll be sure to bookmark this page and come back for future reference...thankyou

:-)
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