Technique - personal mental cleansing - IMO important!!

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Rob

EDIT: OK, well some people have had success with this some have only have not been so successful. I think it might work best for people like me who have grown used to not facing problems in life head on, but instead try to ignore or run from them.....I still need more testers though!!

Hi!!

I have been searching for years now for a technique which can be used to help clear up negative associated memories, and about a month ago I created one. Since then I have applied it, with good success, to a number of things which have been playing on my mind, causing mental anguish. I believe it can be used on anything which causes distress, and beyond.

Note for the lazy!!

Now, I know long posts can be a drag to read, and often if I see something too long I either skim it or will read it (yeah I am lazy!). So, if you just want to technique, go to the relevant section bit below.
And I would really appreciate some feedback!!


So first, a tiny bit of history, and a little discussion around the topic in general.

I used to be a very insecure individual - to be precise, extraordinarily and quite impressively insecure! Of course I still am, but less so, and paradoxically my insecurity has caused a large growth in personal strength leading to enormous security in who and what I am, even if my unconscious driven immediate personality continues to be ahh problematic. But one of my big issues was that, sometimes suddenly and for not consciously perceptible reason, sometimes following lines of association, a very painful memory would come to mind - often these were extremely embarrassing (always socially related) incidents, which would cause my entire mind and psyche to go into a sort of "lockdown" of overwhelmingly painful emotions and feelings, like a sort of implosion of the mind in which everything stops except a terrible feeling of "OMGF**KF**KF**KAAARRRGGGGaarrarg!!!". Nasty. Now, whenever this happens, I apply my technique, and it appears that this problem is getting less severe. It also appears that painful memories dont return, and if they do, they dont have anywhere near the same hold over me.
Put simply, the technique would appear to clear and cleanse associative type memories, and much more.

btw it is my opinion that this lockdown feeling is related to OCD type problems. I used to have what can only be described as a very mild non-debilitating OCD. And IMO this sort of thing can be related strongly to personality types. Each "type" has its own issues which are likely to come up, in other words. OCD issues are related, similar to the above, to the mind kinda "freezing" into a certain state, and having a lot of difficulty progressing beyond that state. Like, the obsessive hand washer, who is stuck in the "must wash hands must wash hands must wash hands" and cannot get beyond this, started by eg the negative implications of dirty hands holding the mind while they are being washed, but building up to be quite apart from that, since each time he washes and goes into "lockdown" his psyche, like a river that's been dammed, continues to add more and more of the same energy to the issue, and so this energy pool, associated with a certain action, becomes important in itself.



Why this works??


Now, its tempting for someone who is inexperienced in personal development to say something like "well, that's not such a bad memory, because blah blah blah nobody cares blah blah blah" which to be fair is what we all do. We try and think our way out of it, hoping that our trains of thought and logic  - which are often valid! - will help. Unfortunately, this doesn't help one bit, since it does not address the core of the problem - but precisely what this core problem is, I am still not 100%. For now, we will just say it is the emotional association to memories and thoughts. Its like, your mind has a giant filing cabinet, and the emotions associated with any issue is what defines how big a flag it has on it. Painful memories have huge red flags on them, and get noticed regularly. So, what we want to do is remove the bad flags, ie remove the associated emotions which seem to be (and quite possible, literally are) stuck to those memories, thus releasing the memories and not necessitating their regular recurrence into consciousness.

You will notice that I have been discussing all this with respect to painful memories, since this is the angle I am coming from, but it can also be applied to anything which is playing on your mind in a bad way, or even just general feelings of uneasiness.


Anyway, on to the technique!!!!!

Its mind boggling simple. My negative memories, I always used to shy from them, not want to face them head on, basically run away and refuse to look them in the eye. Which is precisely and quite exactly the wrong thing to do. The subconscious mind brings these things up because it wants you to focus on them. But how do you focus on them? Well, that's just it really. You take the memory, and what I do is actually feel like I am grabbing that memory and placing it directly in front of me. I also gather all the negative feeling associated with that memory (sometimes focusing primarily on the feeling, sometimes on the memory), and place them in front of me. This is kinda difficult to describe, for reasons I will come to, but it is literally like placing it all right in front of you. If you have difficulty with this, imagine a physical ball hanging there, coloured (literally) with emotions (don't think just DO!), and this ball contains all those nasty feelings, all the memories, everything from this event you wish to cleanse. Feel all this, tangibly there, right and really like it IS THERE!! And then, all you have to do, is stare at this thing, head on. Concentrate on it, concentrate on the memory and feelings, like you are staring them in the face. If necessary, if your mind tries to shy away, you might have to force yourself to stare at it, grit your teeth if you have to and Just Stare!
And. That. Is. It!!!
After a few seconds (up to 5 or 10, usually for me about 2 to 5 seconds), you should notice a tangible clearing sensation. You go from feeling bad, to feeling a euphoric rush and slight lightness - not an understatement! It might happen suddenly in an instant, it might be that it happens over the course of a second. It never takes that long though. Once you reach this feeling, you can relax and release the memory, and go on your merry way about whatever it is you were doing!

Extra notes:

- Sometimes, you will come to something that doesn't want to clear, or only clears incompletely. This is a sign that you have not gathered everything together that is necessary. In other words, there is still some core energy or perhaps memory that is not being brought into focus. When this happens, I extend my mind from the issue to try and find the other associations, its like moving forwards in mind space, and/or searching for the core of negative energy which has not been addressed. I am sorry this is so vague, but I have a lof of difficulty putting into words my own inner techniques. Try a sort of free form association, only instead of with thoughts do it with energies. So you start with a memory, which has associated energies - you clear this, but some energy/feeling remains (ie you do not feel completely clear of the issue). Focus on this feeling. What other feelings does this evoke? Take those energies/feelings, and then focus on them too. Separately, or with the other stuff, your choice. I think I tend to do separate.

- Something else to try if you get an incomplete clear, or just to add to the technique. While focusing attention on the issue, you can also shift focus of physical attention to a certain chakra, and connect that chakra to the issue. I am unsure if this can help because chakras spin with a certain energy, or because in my mind chakras are associated with certain ideas/ideals (love, joy, grounding) which the subconscious mind uses to apply to the idea, giving more things to resolve it with.

- I mentioned that you can grit your teeth when doing this, tense your mental and indeed physical muscles. I am slightly unsure, but think that preferably this should be avoided. To be honest it doesnt make too much difference, and indeed sometimes if I tense my attention to an issue for euphoria that comes after is greater (although perhaps just indicative of a more difficult issue), but it takes maybe a few seconds longer to get to, which would seem to imply its not the best way. IMO the best approach is more of a strong willed one, like your mind it made of unmoving but completely unstressed titanium, focused like a spread laser beam on the issue at hand.

- As I said, I focus here on memories and associations. However, anything can be focused on like this, even unresolved current issues, or immediate feelings. However, in the latter two cases, since they are still current there is still the possibility that they will continue recurring, because the mind is still funnelling negative worrisome energy to the issue. However, it does most definitely still help. The control you have over your mind after may determine how much more negative energy is attached to the issue.

- Where I am coming from with the "place this idea in front of you" is rather hard to explain. It is how I view and manipulate my own internal environment, and can only be expressed as a sort of mind space, which in part has coordinates but in part is in the realm of mind, which has no coordinates. But if you really want to know what I mean, first start watching your own mind very closely. Watch where new thoughts appear – they will be like little sparks in your head, and will probably originate from a certain region of your brain (whether this is physically true or a construction of mind space is, for our purposes, irrelevant). When they appear they don't have words attached to them – it is turned into words after to add solidity to the thought, to allow the conscious mind to "hold" them better. It is possible to have complete trains of thought without words (chances are you do it all the time but don't realise it), which happen very fast, but can end up going round in circles!! Another good thing to try is to observe the space inside your own head (again, mind space overlaid over the physical region inside your head), find out where the mental "knots" are, where the light areas are, etc. Personally I have a knot of tight energy in the middle back of my head, and the third eye type energies at the front (light! joy!). Continue down this road and you may discover some amazing, life changing things. Its just very hard to explain them to anyone and, often, not a good idea to try :wink:. Oh, and bearing all the above in mind, it is not always necessary to places the issue infront of you, although I do usually prefer it. But sometimes I will notice an energy core somewhere, in my mind space, or even located somewhere in my body, and I focus on it there. So yeah there are no rules really, make it up as you go along, best way!!!   :bouncy:


More theory on why this works

I am reading an awesome book at the moment (quite quite brilliant book I must say!) called "the adaptive unconscious" (by Timothy D. Wilson  <poke! poke!!> lol just noticed 20 pages of bibliography !!! fun  :shock:  ) in which, at one point, he talks about the processing power of the adaptive unconscious mind compared to the conscious mind. Its a bit of an unfair comparison since they are such wildly different things, but useful to bear in mind. I cannot remember the exact numbers off the top of my head, but it was saying conscious mind processes 20 pieces of info per second max, whereas unconscious processes more like 20,000. Also, there is the old maxim of energy flows where attention goes. So, its like the job of the conscious mind is to direct the processing power of the unconscious. What I think happens here, is the unconscious mind flags something, passes it to the conscious mind which decides whether to approve further processing on that topic, or to ignore. If it approves, subconscious goes at it – crunch crunch, information is processed and arranged accordingly, energy is released from the issue, things are understood properly, and filed as they should be. If you ignore it, because it feels bad to think about it, then not only are you denying your mind the ability to process that thought/memory/issue properly, but you are also adding more negative energy to the issue, effectively increasing the size of the flag attached to it.
Alternatively, it could just be that the conscious minds focus provides a sort of energy pathway, which allows the energy connected to the issue to move on its way and dissipate, thus clearing the issue.
As for the euphoric feeling, that's either a natural feeling when energy is released from stagnant conditions, caused by letting go of these negative energies, or it is the unconscious minds way of patting you on the back, or said unconscious breathing a sigh of relief like "oooh thank self that's been sorted!" – or all the above.

Wow, this post is HUGE! I think I am gonna turn it into an article and put it on my mates site :grin:

I would love any comments on the above. And I would be ecstatic to get some feedback on the technique!! I think it has a lot to recommend it.


And if you got this far you deserve a big shiny medal :grin: :grin: :grin:

Hope you found it interesting....

Rob
(!!!Formerly known as Inguma!!!)
You are the Alpha and the Omega. You are vaster than the universe and more powerful than a flaring supernova. You are truly incredible!!

Ryuji

Inguma,

ill give it a shot - have few things like that to sort out but ill start out with a LBRP to clear out area and set it up for medation at which point ill try this method :)

thanks for post,
Ryu

Squirrelly

Wow, your fingers must hurt after typing all of that  :shock:

Your technique seems effective. Pretty much everybody has at least some regretful memories. What I used to do to release stress is to put the memory into a picture, and then blast it into a million pieces with hi-tech machine guns! Mentally, of course!

Rob

Hehe I have ninja trained fingers - quick as lightning!! Its all good  :lol: . Seriously though thanks for reading!! Your eyes must have hurt too by the end  :grin:

Ryuji - LBRP, good plan! I have had one or two powerful experiences with that ritual. Personally I tend to use my method all the time, as soon as a painful memory, feeling, or thought comes up, but I would also like to try sitting down in meditation and going through my entire life in my mind, and applying it to every negative memory that comes up. Let me know how you get on!

Squirrelly - interesting, what you describe is very similar one of Robert Bruces methods I used to use, ehh core image removal thats it. Since I got this method going though, I have come to the opinion that real core of these methods is powerful conscious focus, aimed at a single representative thing - in your case and RB's a picture, in mine a thought/memory/energy form/mind sphere collection.
Btw RB's method was to make the memory into a representative picture, turn it over (breaking any connections on the reverse of the picture), slashing it up with a sword, and then burning it with a flaming torch - and maybe sealing it with a sacred symbol. But ahh, too much extra for me to make it an inbuilt reaction - I just focus on the memory form, its much easier  :grin:. Might have to try testing all these similar methods side by side (if possible) for effectiveness at some point, but I guess its just what works best for you personally.
(!!!Formerly known as Inguma!!!)
You are the Alpha and the Omega. You are vaster than the universe and more powerful than a flaring supernova. You are truly incredible!!

Leilah

Leaning over
Crawling up
Stumbling all around
Losing my place
Only to find I've come full circle.

Rob

Heh, thanks ! One other thing, when you feel the "lightness", dont drop your focus but keep holding it. I find the feeling spreads, and then kinda reaches a plateau or dissipates. And the focus should be as uninterrupted by other thoughts as possible  :grin: .
Cheers!!
Rob
(!!!Formerly known as Inguma!!!)
You are the Alpha and the Omega. You are vaster than the universe and more powerful than a flaring supernova. You are truly incredible!!

Leilah

Eh. I'm having some trouble! It seemed a lot easier when I first I read it. Like, it's hard for me to gather the feelings of the experience while watching the memory play in my head (is that what were supposed to do?). I can concentrate all I like but I can't get any emotions when I think back on these things. It's weird. Any suggestions?

Today in class I was anxious for some reason and so I tried to.. like focus on it. It came to a point where the anxiety just vanished but reappeared several moments later. And the euphoric rush thing, not feeling it at all. lol. If you could just try to describe your technique a little more thoroughly it would really help. If not I guess I can just try and figure something out. Thanks.
Leaning over
Crawling up
Stumbling all around
Losing my place
Only to find I've come full circle.

Rob

Hey Leilah!!

Great to hear the anxiety vanished - thats is whats supposed to happen, but as for the euphoric rush I dunno that could just be me! I am thinking that the anxious feeling reappeared because it was constantly being fed by a worry while in class? So, applying focus to the source of the worry might help.
Immediate issues/insecurities are certainly one of the hardest to sort out, so its a good start that you got anything at all.

QuoteEh. I'm having some trouble! It seemed a lot easier when I first I read it. Like, it's hard for me to gather the feelings of the experience while watching the memory play in my head (is that what were supposed to do?). I can concentrate all I like but I can't get any emotions when I think back on these things. It's weird. Any suggestions?

Trying to concentrate on two things at once is very very hard, I can see why you would be having difficulty with this!!!
And well, I dont think you need to keep the memory playing in your head. Just take the feelings from the experience, face them head on and concentrate on them. You could try taking a snapshot of the memory also, give that a go, but IMO the feelings are the best approach, so they are the core of what we are trying to tackle. There is no need to constantly keep all visual and emotional pointers to it in your mind while doing this, recall them first but then focus solely on the feelings, probably the best approach. Your mind knows they are all associated, and where the roots of these feelings are, and will sort that for you to a large extent.

Hope this helps!! Thanks for giving it a go  :smile:

Rob
(!!!Formerly known as Inguma!!!)
You are the Alpha and the Omega. You are vaster than the universe and more powerful than a flaring supernova. You are truly incredible!!

Leilah

Thanks for elaborating, Rob. I'm going to experiment with this technique some more before I post results.
Leaning over
Crawling up
Stumbling all around
Losing my place
Only to find I've come full circle.

Mark K

Inguma,

I can relate so well.
I too have problems with insecurity, shyness, self conciousness, making an butt of myself and just generally to being able to be myself comfortably.
And i too have experienced things where i would do or say something that i look back at (or even immediately) say to myself "Mark, you really suck...seriously... you suck"

Basically, this is my understanding of it (correct me if im wrong here or if im just repeating what you wrote).

I think your technique works well because instead of dwelling on how bad the event makes us feel and trying to forget it, we are basically focusing on it and clearing our concious mind of other thoughts to better allow our subconcious to process the event and store it away so we dont need to dwell on it any longer.
Our subconcious mind was basically procrastinating on storing it away because it wasnt quite sure how do deal with the situation?
Perhaps the nature of these events is so personal, our subconcious may need to be in the right condition to process it properly?

Ive been spending a great deal of time thinking about this sort of stuff lately but have never really had a chance to express it... Be it talking to someone or writing it down. So its a bit hard to actually say what i mean. So if my post seems a bit waffly... my apologies hehe
metaphysicallychallengedparanoidschizotype

Rob

Hey Mark! No, not waffly at all, very clear in fact - probably a lot clearer than my own enormous post!  :grin:


Quote from: Mark K

I can relate so well.
I too have problems with insecurity, shyness, self conciousness, making an butt of myself and just generally to being able to be myself comfortably.
And i too have experienced things where i would do or say something that i look back at (or even immediately) say to myself "Mark, you really suck...seriously... you suck"

Yeah, its horrible isnt it....and its very difficult to do anything to break your mind from this thought pattern when you are in the middle of it. And all the other stuff, those subconscious programs of shyness, insecurity, etc, I got them too - they are a real bummer...
But I am pleased to say, that since I started confronting issues with my technique, the whole spasm of negative energy thing locking up my mind, has pretty much vanished!! Its awesome!!! Am quite please with myself, dont mind telling you!! Now, when it happens at all, my mind might freeze up a little, but there is no negative energy there, and instead I am simply sitting there observing my mind and prodding it into action again (imagining rotary movement seems good - constant movement, no breaks).

Quote from: Mark KBasically, this is my understanding of it (correct me if im wrong here or if im just repeating what you wrote).

I think your technique works well because instead of dwelling on how bad the event makes us feel and trying to forget it, we are basically focusing on it and clearing our concious mind of other thoughts to better allow our subconcious to process the event and store it away so we dont need to dwell on it any longer.
Our subconcious mind was basically procrastinating on storing it away because it wasnt quite sure how do deal with the situation?
Perhaps the nature of these events is so personal, our subconcious may need to be in the right condition to process it properly?

Yes, thats a really good way of putting it! And I might add that I have noticed that if you are distracted when in the middle of focusing on an issue, it totally breaks what you are doing, and you have to start again pretty much from the beginning. Which is very similar to meditation, where you keep your conscious mind focused on one thing or no-thing, so that the unconscious mind can carry out its processing most efficiently in the background. Interesting stuff! Have you had much success with the method btw? I am wondering if its something which is most personally useful to me, since nobody else here seems to have had much success  :wink:  although I guess I needed it the most..

Rob
(!!!Formerly known as Inguma!!!)
You are the Alpha and the Omega. You are vaster than the universe and more powerful than a flaring supernova. You are truly incredible!!

Leilah

Well. I think your right. This is probably a personal technique, and a personal one only. At least that's how it is for me. I've tried twisting this method in several ways (and times) and I can never seem to get a lasting effect. I suppose I will have to invent my own procedure. So, if anything, I'd like to thank you for inspiring me to do so.
Leaning over
Crawling up
Stumbling all around
Losing my place
Only to find I've come full circle.

Rob

QuoteWell. I think your right. This is probably a personal technique, and a personal one only. At least that's how it is for me. I've tried twisting this method in several ways (and times) and I can never seem to get a lasting effect. I suppose I will have to invent my own procedure. So, if anything, I'd like to thank you for inspiring me to do so.

Well, thanks for trying  :grin:
I do however think its interesting that you still get the negative feelings to dissapear, shame they will return on you though.
Yes! Invent!! And then tell us all what you find!!
I have edited the start of my main post btw to reflect the fact that nobody else seems to be having any major luck with it.
And if anyone has read it, and not found it useful, please do say so! Even a lack of effect is useful for me to know.

Rob
(!!!Formerly known as Inguma!!!)
You are the Alpha and the Omega. You are vaster than the universe and more powerful than a flaring supernova. You are truly incredible!!

Mark K

Hey Rob,
Glad that post made sense, i just wanted to make sure i understood properly :)

Ive used your technique a few times since i read about it. Not so much for specific situations, but just feelings in general.
And it must say, it works a treat :D

Through it im learning how to keep a clear head in situations i would usually find uncomfortable and also to keep negative thoughts well undercontrol.

If i were to use it for a specific situation or memory, i find its extra important to make sure you dont let these feelings escape the ball and start doing bad things. So essentially yeah, you really are containing all those bad feelings and basically letting your mind attack them while theyre most vulnerable.

Thanks again Rob,

Mark
metaphysicallychallengedparanoidschizotype

Rob

Quote from: Mark KHey Rob,
Glad that post made sense, i just wanted to make sure i understood properly :)

Ive used your technique a few times since i read about it. Not so much for specific situations, but just feelings in general.
And it must say, it works a treat :D

Yey!! I am really really pleased to hear you are finding it useful!!
<re-edits first post>

Quote from: Mark KThrough it im learning how to keep a clear head in situations i would usually find uncomfortable and also to keep negative thoughts well undercontrol.


Yes, and I find that it also teaches you to face things in life head on, like everytime my mind automatically turns away from something I now have another automatic machanisms to turn right back at them and stare them down. I guess it also helps build willpower.

Quote from: Mark K
If i were to use it for a specific situation or memory, i find its extra important to make sure you dont let these feelings escape the ball and start doing bad things. So essentially yeah, you really are containing all those bad feelings and basically letting your mind attack them while theyre most vulnerable.

Thanks again Rob,

Mark

Yes! When they are most vulnerable, ie when they are most visible in your mind. In a way, your mind then does the hard work for you, bringing all these feeling to the fore which otherwise would be quite difficult to find and pin down.

Anytime  :smile:  - thanks for your feedback!

Rob
(!!!Formerly known as Inguma!!!)
You are the Alpha and the Omega. You are vaster than the universe and more powerful than a flaring supernova. You are truly incredible!!

Kenneth

Hello Inguma!

I couldn't agree more with your technique, as it is very much the same basis and general "method" that I use, and have been using for several years now.

I have found through personal experience, that there are several difficulties with this technique though, (all of them "correctable" though), the most serious being:

- The ego's own defense, that works just like the body's immune defense. (Meaning its Unconscious, automatic, repetitive, programmable etc.)
What we are doing is "forcing" it to accept the unacceptable, and sometimes this "forcing" creates serious problems, where other techniques takes the EGO and "self-destruct-mechanism before admitting" into account. (And - by the way, the Ego-defense is strong enough that it can create split personalities as a way of "coping", and actually shut our brain down, if a situation or pain becomes too much, so please be at least a little careful here  :wink: )

A technique that you would feel really at home with would be EFT or Emotional Freedom Technique, that actually builds upon this "focusing" on the situation and emotions, but being in the present, and at the same time stimulating energy-points by tapping on your face, body and hands.

(Sounds stupid, but it works and the manual and literally thousand of different case stories on HOW to apply or deliver it, is free on the site www.emofree.com )

Try it out, it is very, very effective!

Another little technique, that I would like to add to your Focus technique, is that there are some situations that are simply too pain full to be present and focused in. We shy away from them. Here it helps if you actively keep thinking "Even though I cannot accept this situation / handle this situation / take this situation etc. etc., I deeply and completely accept my self.) It is a "core" technique from EFT, that works wonders with those otherwise "stuck" feelings, emotions and paradoxes (where we are "split" inside).

Another pointer as to why this Focusing technique actually works, and a lot of fine hints and explanations, can be found in Eckhart Tolles "The power of Now". As I see it, it is actually re-playing the situation in the NOW (as in bringing the situation to the here and now), without re-living it (as in bringing me back to then), that makes the difference when solving and finding peace inside  :grin:

Another side of this technique is, that you can use it to actually "train" yourself in a given emotion, like you would train your body before a marathon  :wink: .... How do you do that then? Simple actually, When you are in a "safe" situation, then find the situations that you are having difficulties with, and treat them as all the 3-5-10-20 kilometers you have to run before the actual marathon. Work "through" them, with the intent that you are becoming "better" / getting "used" to or at those feelings, like you KNOW that you will get into shape by running longer and longer turns, or lifting heavier and heavier weights. Use the same "precautions" here, as you would in a normal training program, meaning DO NOT drive your self too hard, or injuries are bound to happen  :cry: .

Yet another little detail: It is not HOW I am feeling that is important - but How I am feeling about how I am feeling!!!  :twisted:

I hope, that you can use some of these pointers and hints !!!!
/Kenneth

--- One thing at a time, be in NOW, and be gentle to yourself ---

--- Your biggest obstacle is most of the time also your most powerfull startingpoint ---